Your Relationship on "Do Not Disturb"​​​
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Your Relationship on "Do Not Disturb"​​​

In a world where everything is shared, one thing that should be more private than others is your relationship.


This is a response to "The 12 Stages of Going Instagram Official".

Now, before you come at me bashing how going public with your relationship is exciting and a way to spread the good news quickly, I am not here to put down those that choose to air everything online about their love life. If people find happiness and true contentment in doing that then great! This is only my opinion as I have grown up watching the rise of social media through my high school years to now my full on adult years.

Back in the day, I was very prone to put everything online about my relationship. I wanted people to see how excited I was about my boyfriend. I continued this throughout the relationship. I would make heartfelt posts, collages, funny videos, and more to show how happy I was in my relationship. The only problem was, I was not really that happy in my relationship. I painted a skewed picture for people to see. I thought if I posted and interacted more with people about my relationship, the more it would prove to myself that I was happy and content. That is the first problem. Why was I posting? I was not posting because I was genuinely happy. I was posting to gain some type of dopamine high and clarity that my relationship was in fact healthy.

People are always comparing on social media and for me looking back, I wish I had not posted as much as I did. People always say that the picture does not always mean the truth of what is actually happening behind the scenes. If that is not a truer thing! Now, some people do post and are genuinely happy, if they are, then more power to them. This is just my story.

My relationship with social media has tapered over the years and I still do not know how I truly feel about it to this day. I would say though that overall, it is more damaging than good.

What I do know though is that I want my next relationship to be much more private. I want the important people in my life to see what is going on, but other than that, I am content going on without expressing to the world what is happening. If those people that see my post about my new man are close to me, they would have already known about them. Getting a special someone is a big thing in life and I want to be able to share those special moments with the people I love through personal calls and texts. In today's world, we overshare and people have access to way too much. By keeping my relationship private and not airing out every little thing we do, I know those moments will forever be special for us and not the rest of the world.

Plus, what happens if we break up? Here comes the awkward moment of people not knowing the full scope and assuming ya'll are still together based off of social media. People will be confused and have their own judgements of the situation in their head. They will be like 'you looked so happy!" or "what happened I thought y'all just took that ski trip!" By not posting, you can avoid a lot of the feedback from the world because you never revealed it in the first place. I challenge you, like I challenge myself, to not post about your significant other as much and revel in the moments you share together without the world knowing it. When you do take pictures, take them and share them with your family and friends. Your family and friends will feel more special as a result because they receive pictures coming from you compared to a basic social media app.

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