You’re sitting and scrolling through social media, looking at a stream of selfies and photos of done-up people’s evening out yesterday.

You pause on a particularly striking photo of a seemingly perfect girl. Her hair falls perfectly in place without a bit of frizz, her makeup looks like it’s been professionally done, and her outfit compliments her every feature.

She doesn’t even look like she needs to try. She probably doesn’t try. She’s just naturally perfect.

You breathe out as you realize that you’re comparing yourself to her. Sure, you can get done up and look pretty good. But you also know yourself: it’s pretty much rare when you look like her. Usually, you look incredibly typical.

But here’s what you don’t see when you look at her picture…

You don’t see how she woke up with her face all blotchy in the t-shirt she accidentally fell asleep in last night.

You don’t see all of the times she slept through her alarm and then left a shower out of her morning routine.

You don’t see her when she hasn’t gotten off the couch all day, and her hair is sticking out of her loose ponytail in every which way.

You don’t see her oily face before she washes it.

You don’t see the long process of her putting on makeup.

(But if she skipped that step, I bet everyone would see it and take note).

You don’t see what her hair looked like before she fried it on hot metal and sprayed glue on it to make it stay in place.

You don’t see the multiple outfits strewn all over her bed, rejected. Because sometimes, things just aren’t flattering.

(You also don’t hear the mumble under her breath: “maybe I should’ve gone to the gym”).

When you look at that picture of her, you don’t see the many different camera angles; you don’t see the various demo smiles; you don’t see the unfiltered product.

And do you know what else you don’t see?

You don’t see the rest of her life.

You don’t see how stressed she is every day.

You didn’t see why she fell asleep crying last night.

You didn’t see her friend not answer her calls when she desperately needed her to.

You didn’t see the exam she failed last class.

You don’t see how she beats herself up over her imperfections.

You didn’t hear what was said during her phone call with her father.

You don’t see her self-doubt.

You don’t see the insecurities constantly swarming around her head.

You don’t see her lingering unhappiness that she can’t seem to shake.

You don’t see the whole her.

And you see, that doesn’t help anyone-- neither of you. It doesn’t help your self-image, and it doesn’t help her be able to reach out to someone.

Because on social media, we see the good parts of life that people want to broadcast. We see what’s good and happy and successful and pretty, but we hardly see the internal battles people are fighting. It's important to remember how incredibly human everyone is.

It’s true: “The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel,” and this is exactly what social media allows-- or forces-- you to do.

When you look in that mirror, when you look at that picture, when you look at the person in it-- be gentle and kind. To yourself, to that girl in the picture, to everyone you meet.