I have never considered myself a feminist or a Democrat.

Yes, I have gotten criticized for it and yes, I am able to live with myself every day. However, that does not mean this week’s choices did not affect me in multiple ways.

I am still a woman, which means that I woke up Wednesday morning with a stinging fear that due to my genitals and levels of estrogen inside my body, I may never be seen as a equal in society.

I have seen many of my peers rushing to local clinics to get an IUD out of the fear that they may never receive the necessary health benefits needed to appropriate family planning. I have seen my close friends, several of whom immigrated to this country in hopes of a better life, a contradiction we are now coming to face within the days after this election. Their cheeks are stained with the tears that have been brought about by the thought that they will have to face four years of immeasurable distraught, just because of the color of their skin, their accents, and their nationalities. Every inch of them, inches that they should be impeccably proud of, are at potential risk of being torn down.

So, where does a middle class, white female, like myself, fit in? Well, for one, I like having options. I like knowing that Planned Parenthood is located everywhere and is willing to help everyone. I like knowing that I can obtain contraception without being called a slut. I like knowing that I am a female receiving a great education and having the support necessary to know that I am believed in. It is absurd to think that what we have achieved within the past few decades is still new to this nation and we are only taking a step backwards in the hopes of trying to make a country great again by degrading women, those with disabilities, and those who want to make a stand for justice and their rights.

I would never criticize or lash out at those who cast a vote for Trump this past week. There is no point at this stage. But, I will ask those who still believe that a woman’s place is at home and not having a career that they worked hard for, that those in the LGBTQ+ community have the ability to be “made heterosexual,” that I have to live in fear over white, Christian males who will only ever identify as cisgender, disregarding my political thoughts and ideas because I am only a woman and I will never have enough knowledge, education, or a right to stand up for what I believe is right. To see the hopes and dreams of our society come to a halt over someone who finds humor in sexual assault, mocking those who have disabilities, and those who identify as who they truly and proudly are, is exhaustingly troublesome.

I am a woman in America. I am not a feminist and I am not democrat. I have been following politics since I was in middle school and I have been informed of current events and have been smart enough to keep my mouth shut up until now about how I feel about them. I am an educated person in society that has enough common sense to understand the repercussions of this presidential race. I am all of these things and I speak on behalf of women out there who feel the same way. I am an American, but I cannot quite say that I am proud to be one just yet.