Simply put, in the 21st century, it’s un-American to not know the taste and name of Ben and Jerry’s Ice Cream. However, with over 50 flavors to pick from, half of which being chocolate, the struggle to find a perfect pint is real, especially for chocolate lovers. Ben and Jerry’s has a way of describing ice cream that could make your mouth water when you think about it at any point in the day. I mean it. It’s 8 a.m. on a Saturday morning and I’m already trying to reschedule my day to find time to pick up a few pints. However, with these delicious descriptions, it’s impossible to choose. To ease your worries at the grocery store, I’ve ranked the best Ben and Jerry’s flavors for chocolate lovers—take it from a girl who can almost always finish a pint.
1. Phish Food
“Chocolate Ice Cream with Gooey Marshmallow Swirls, Caramel Swirls and Fudge Fish”
I imagine when Drake rapped, “You my right hand; my go-to,” it was about this flavor. Phish food is the bae. The ultimate bae.
2. Boom Chocolatta
“Mocha & Caramel Ice Creams with Chocolate Cookies Fudge Flakes a Chocolate Cookie Core”
Hello, coffee. It takes a special kind of ice cream to fulfill your caffeine and chocolate needs in one bite. Boom Chocolatta, my friends, is that ice cream. I’m a big fan. Personally, I believe that coffee and chocolate is a magical combination and I think we should really value it which is why I’m giving it spot number two.
3. The Tonight Dough
“Caramel & chocolate ice creams with chocolate cookie swirls & gobs of chocolate chip cookie dough & peanut butter cookie dough”
On the real, The Tonight Dough could be described as Phish Food on steroids—in the best way possible. Seriously though, they had me at “Caramel & Chocolate ice creams.” This ice cream is a dream made possible by the three great men: Ben, Jerry and Jimmy Fallon.
4. Peanut Butter Fudge Core
“Chocolate & Peanut Butter Ice Creams with Mini Peanut Butter Cups & a Peanut Butter Fudge Core”
“Fudge Core” should be all you need to know to make you fall in love.
5. Half Baked
“Chocolate & Vanilla Ice Cream with Fudge Brownies & Gobs of Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough”
Although this one features heavenly chocolate’s Satanic sister, vanilla, somehow, Half Baked is still dank. There’s something about the “half-baked” gobs of cookie dough that takes a girl home. Maybe it’s because while baking cookies as young child, I used to just eat the dough. I still eat the raw dough today. Don’t listen to what the nay-sayers tell you, salmonella is a myth!
6. Chocolate Therapy
“Chocolate Ice Cream with Chocolate Cookies & Swirls of Chocolate Pudding Ice Cream”
Chocolate Therapy is reliable. It’s always been there for when you need a chocolate fix but can’t seem to make the tough call between having gobs of peanut butter or caramel. In those moments of despair, Chocolate Therapy is there and ready to love you. It’s the best friend we all wish we had. I give it spot number six because I want it to know that it’s unconditional love doesn't go unnoticed. Thank you, Chocolate Therapy.
7. Everything But The...
“ A collision of Chocolate & Vanilla Ice Creams mixed with Peanut Butter Cups, Fudge Covered Toffee Pieces, White Chocolatey Chunks & Fudge Covered Almonds”
This one is as epic as it sounds, living up to its name by including everything (a chocolate lover need) but the kitchen sink caramel. While I appreciate them adding almonds and toffee to the mix (no comment on the white chocolate), I would be in heaven if a spoonful of this also had a li'l caramel swirl. Dreams.
8. Mint Chocolate Chunk
“Mint Ice Cream with Fudge Chunks”
Yo B&J, I know this flavor is pretty basic, but would it kill you to be a little more descriptive? How about "rich whipped mint ice cream blended with fudge chocolate chunks that at first bite transport you to a minty chocolate bliss, infinitely better than any pillow pint or York you’ve ever had”? Because that’s what I feel like happens after indulging in one spoonful. Though their description would make you think otherwise, Ben and Jerry’s does mint chocolate chip ice cream right. I was raised on Baskin Robin’s Mint Chocolate Chip, so my first bite of Ben and Jerry’s Mint Chocolate Chunk was heaven. Their mint ice cream is out of this world. I know this is such a standard flavor, but try Ben and Jerry’s version just once. You won’t be disappointed.
9. New York Super Fudge Chunk
“Chocolate Ice Cream with White and Dark Fudge Chunks, Pecans, Walnuts & Fudge Covered Almonds”
I know, I know, I know, it sounds like a half-assed “Everything But The…” but hear me out: this one is still dank. If it’s the last pint left at your local grocery store like it usually is, I recommend you still go for it. Ben and Jerry wouldn’t name an ice cream after the great state of New York that isn’t A-1. A piece of advice: don’t judge a pint by its less-than-flavorful description; judge it by its ability to make your taste buds dance. Trust me, this one has the power.
10. Chocolate Fudge Brownie
“Chocolate Ice Cream with Fudge Brownie”
Chocolate Fudge Brownie is as basic as it sounds. There’s nothing too amazing about it, but it’s always available. If you’ve never had it then you’ve been actively avoiding it. For some reason unknown to me, this pint is sold everywhere. I mean everywhere. Chocolate Fudge Brownie is a solid flavor but I have two complaints. First, there’s not much to work with you have chocolate ice cream and fudge brownie. The two textures aren't that different from each other and there’s no other flavor besides chocolate blended in it. Believe me, sometimes chocolate is all you need, but not in this case. I just want something to spice it up. Second, Chocolate Fudge Brownie is extremely heavy. The Fudge Brownie weighs your spoon down. A few bites is all you need. I promise you, you will not finish a whole pint in one evening unless you’re a true champion.
Despite me harping on some flavor’s elements, I think that as long as you’re sticking with Ben and Jerry’s, there’s no way you can go wrong. They know how to make a pint. I love you, Ben and Jerry. So much.
