I never cared for Pewdiepie.

I attempted to watch his videos several years ago when I started getting into the lets play scene but I never found his brand of content that appealing. When the firestorm around his “nazi videos” came out I will admit that I was a part of the mob calling for everything to be taken but eventually gave him the slight benefit of the doubt because for the most part news outlets did take the things out of context (that does not excuse it from happening but that is a separate conversation).

Today we are talking about the straw that should have broken the camel’s back and yet for some reason people are still arguing if that should be the case.

On Sunday evening I was scrolling through my twitter. For the most part, it was reviews and criticism of Rhianna’s new makeup like Fenty until all of a sudden, a few people retweeted news about Pewdiepie. I didn’t read the headlines at first, I simply thought, “he must have broken a milestone” or “I guess he said something dumb again,” after the nazi drama I found it easier to simply turn off the news to particular celebrities.

But then I noticed more and more people talking about, more specifically, I saw an increasing amount of black members of Twitter either acting not surprised or flipping out.

So, I decided to look into what was going on.

Before I continue with this piece I must say a couple of things. First and foremost, I am black. Always have and have always will be black. While I have never been called any variation of the n-word by someone who is non-black, I understand the history and I have seen it be used against others. I say this because my views are going to be considered bias. I know this and my readers should know this too. I may be more emotional than I would want and my readers need to know that. So with that in mind, here are my thoughts:

When I heard Pewdiepie say the n-word( to be more specific the hard ‘r’ version), I almost punched my laptop screen. When I saw a number of comments coming to the defense in regards to him using the word and I almost wanted to just kick my laptop across the room. The most common defense I saw was basically saying that “people shouldn’t let words hurt you”, “if black people use it, it is perfectly fine”, and “these 'SJWs' are just trying to stir up trouble”.

In regards to SJWs, yes I know they can be an issue. While most have good intentions there are a lot of times the actions of this group do at times cause the mass to think those who have true criticism seem like they are whining. For those thinking that just because black people use it, it is okay, we need to break down a lesson for you.

Black people (as far as I know) rarely ever use the n-word with the hard "r."

We know the connotations of it and it leaves a bitter taste. Instead, they took a variation of the word (the one ending with "a") and reclaiming as their own. In a similar frame of members of the LGBTQA+ community trying to reclaim q***r and f****t.

Similar to that group, while it is okay for us to say the n-word because it was a term used to diminish us and turn it into something else, non-black people cannot use it because it was a tool created by them to break us. It is not in a similar frame like calling a white person a cracker or a honky (while this term was used to stereotype against poorer white groups for a time).

The final excuse is the thought that black people need to learn to let things go or words shouldn’t hold weight. This was the comment that nearly had my eyes rolling all the way back to my skull because it is victim blaming.

Most people who I saw using this defense were non-black people which made the statement even more infuriating. Sometimes people take the saying of sticks and stones to heart and think that words carry no weight.

But they do, especially words soaked in history. A history that happened over 400 years ago and still have a lasting impact on a people. The n-word was used to demonize and reduce black people to nothing. It is our choice alone if we want to rework it and reclaim it to something else. It is our choice if we choose to let it go and forgive. Not the choice of the ones who benefitted from the use.

As I finish these thoughts, Pewdiepie issued a brief statement to apologize for his actions. While there will be some who accept it and move on, I don’t think I can bring myself to. Once you bring yourself to a point to use a slur or a word that carried that type of weight without understanding the history or even freely ignoring it, you no longer deserve a free pass to be ignorant. I would appreciate the apology but this will be a reminder to never support him or at least be wary.

Let this be a lesson to all who wonder why people reacted this way. If you don’t understand the weight, do your research. If you see a group of people upset, listen and keep quiet. If it does not affect you, you don’t need to voice your opinions over it. And if it is something that would affect you but see no concern, give yourself a reminder as to why some others would still care even if you don’t. And for those who think it’s okay to use the word, I will happily accept any donations for the slavery reparations fund.