Remember, everything you do is wrong. Every single step you take, every breath you take, the way you speak, the way you dress, everything. Throughout your day, remember to stress about every single detail, every small action, and every small word. You only get to live this day once.
Make sure you look put together when you get dressed in the morning. The way you look is EVERYTHING, and the only thing that matters. Don’t you dare try something new - you won’t be able to pull it off. Wear whats ‘in’ right now, not what you actually want to wear. Are you sure you want to wear that coat? You always wear that coat. Are you sure you even want to wear a coat? Yeah, its cold outside, but coats aren’t very cool.
Make sure to watch your feet when you walk. Make sure with each step you ask these questions: “Did I just step on something? Am I walking crooked? Are my ankles straight, my back hunched? Is anyone watching me?” You wouldn’t want to mess up walking and trip while people are watching you. Just keep your head down and don’t make eye contact with anyone, ever.
Oh, and make sure you keep your eyes on the steps of the staircase. If you don’t, you’ll trip, and you don’t want people to see you trip.
Make sure you think of everyone else’s feelings and opinions before you say anything. Their opinions matter the most, so think over everything you have to say thoroughly to avoid stepping on anyones toes. Are you sure you want to say that? Remember, if you mess up people are going to remember it forever. There is no room for mistakes. Remember to speak clearly and annunciate. You wouldn’t want your speech impediment coming through, now would you.
Make sure you follow all the necessary steps to question your actions. Remember, you know you’re doing it right if you constantly feel like crap.