Fall semester is coming to a close. The air is cool, the scarves are huge, and the amount of work you have to do before school is out for Winter break is almost as much coffee as you have consumed in the past 2 weeks.
Trust me, I feel ya. I'm the queen of procrastination and putting important things off until my anxiety overpowers my depression. College is doing great things for me.
So, in the spirit of finals week and the ever-impending doom that is life, allow me to provide some amazing activities to do instead of what you're actually supposed to be doing.
Sleep.
Naps never hurt nobody.
Eat.
Going out to eat is even better because it wastes more time. Invite your friends.
Cry.
Drive around listening to all those old CD's you shoved under the passenger seat a million years ago.
Old Taylor Swift is best.
Call your mom.
Get coffee.
Text that one boy who you stopped talking to a while ago because you have commitment issues.
You know he'll text you back.
Do that laundry that's been piling up for weeks because you're a lazy bum.
Decorate your apartment or house for Christmas.
The best way to spread Christmas cheer, is avoiding all your homework and making it look like Santa threw up.
Apply for jobs.
Write a letter to your future self about how terrible your life is at this exact moment.
It will be super fun to look back on the pain and suffering your young adult life caused.
Watch "The Office".
Again.
Watch "New Girl".
Again.
Watch all the 'Harry Potter' movies.
That should take up at least 25 hours.
Watch ice melt.
Call your dad.
Try to understand what went wrong in your life.
Cry.
Stare off into the distance.
Think about all the things you have to do and aren't doing.
Call your Grandma.
Think about all your past trama.
You gotta figure out why you are the way you are sometime.
Drink some chocolate milk.
I don't know, it sounds good right now though.
Stub your toe really really hard.
Sell you soul.
Read a book.
Reading for fun? Yes. It exists.
Eat some chicken nuggets.
Look off into the distance for a really long time until someone does that weird wave thing to try to make you pay attention to them again even though you don't want to.
Cut your own bangs.
I've done this from personal experience.
Ask God for forgiveness.
Work out.
Hahahahaha.
Learn how to play the piccolo.
Post a pic of you "studying" with your cute coffee mug and color-coordinated notes.
We all know you just want sympathy. That Valencia filter isn;t going to hide your shame.
Take a bath.
Cry.
Name your future children.
And then think about how terrible a parent your going to be.
And then think about having to birth a human being from your body.
Now that's scary.
Congratulate yourself from getting this far in life.
Let your future self worry about the endless homework you have to get done and go to bed.
I hope this will help you get through finals and another semester of school. The pain will end. Eventually. Hopefully.
Happy procrastination!