“Was I pretty enough?” You think to yourself as you lie on the floor in heartache once again.
“Was I skinny enough?” You utter as you stand in the mirror, sucking in your flesh blaming your body for the pings in your heart.
“Was I smart enough?” You wonder to yourself as you rehash the questions from the exam you just took.
“Was I strong enough?” You worry as you leave the gym.
“Was I enough?”
It all echoes through your head as you look back at all the things that went wrong or the things that seemed to go wrong.
It becomes a mean self-affliction.
As a woman, you blame yourself for every little thing that doesn’t work out.
You apologize for moments that don’t require an apology at all.
“I’m sorry my hair is a mess.”
“I’m sorry I’m so tired.”
“I’m sorry the weather is bad.”
“I’m sorry” becomes your mantra, as well as a never-ending chain of pointless apologies.
Somehow, you’re taught from a young age to base everything on your appearance.
Don’t play too rough, you’ll get dirty. Don’t talk too loud. Don’t dress messy. Tuck in your stomach.
Keep your nails clean. Brush your hair. Put on makeup. Shave your legs. Wear perfume.
Don’t cross your legs. Don’t sit with your legs apart. Don’t burp. Don’t slouch.
Don’t give your opinion.
Your life is dictated to be this way the minute your gender is revealed on an ultrasound.
Pink balloons fill hospital rooms and you become a “princess,” but not a princess that is ever actually treated like royalty.
You’re the princess from a Disney movie. The one cleaning floors that loses her beauty at midnight.
You’re the one standing there, being taught daily that you’re not enough until a Fairy Godmother appears to make you beautiful.
“Are my boobs big enough?”
“Is my hair thick enough?”
“Is my stomach flat enough?”
“Am I pretty enough?”
Why have you allowed the world to dictate to you what constitutes enough?
Why have you allowed other people to give value you to you?
You’ve given others permission to measure something that is not theirs to measure.
It’s YOURS and yours alone.
Darling let me tell you that you ARE pretty.
And your heart is BEAUTIFUL.
You are and always WILL BE enough.
You. Are. Enough.
Be BRILLIANT. And be YOU.