Ted Cruz and Bernie Sanders. Oh, boy -- where do I even start? If Clinton and Trump magically lose their party nomination, (which may yet happen -- strong emphasis on may) Cruz and Sanders are the next contenders on, "The Country Is Screwed!"-- a spin off of Drew Carey's "The Price Is Right," in case you were curious. As usual, you still have to vote for one of them, so we had better take a look at the pertinent facts on these two candidates. OK, I guess you could do a write in vote -- that always turns out well. Regardless, without further ado I present the second act of America's Circus: The Wacky Bernster and Rainbow Clad Cruz.
Bernie Sanders
Notable achievements: Not one Super PAC supporting him, takes all campaign donations via grassroots movement. Popular in the rural and classically conservative state of Vermont, in which he was senator and mayor. Balanced the budget in Burlington and sponsored over 6,000 bills in congress.
Notable failures: Voted for a 1994 crime bill that would have increased penalties for repeat offenders and increased funding for expanding prisons (an idea he claims he is ardently against). Entering the candidacy race when he's 74-years-old (being president is a tad stressful, I don't want the man to have heart palpitations). Focusing too much on only a few issues, not elaborating on others.
Social policy: Pro-choice. Pro-LGBT rights. Drug addiction should be treated as a disease, not a crime. Take marijuana off controlled substance list. Public colleges and universities should be tuition free. Gun control supporter, but not as much as Clinton. Single payer health care system.
Economic policy: Does not support any current free trade agreements. Break up major Wall Street firms. Reform estate tax. Break up large banks. Reform how much the top one percent contributes in taxes.
Foreign policy: Not supportive of unilateral action against terrorism. Focus on ISIS. Open negotiations with everyone, including Iran. Normalize relations with Cuba. Open borders and provide humanitarian assistance to Syria and refugees. More focused on domestic issues than foreign policy ones.
Ted Cruz
Notable achievements: Graduate of both Harvard and Princeton with extremely high honors. Sponsor of 97 bills in the Senate. The first Hispanic Solicitor General in Texas and the youngest Solicitor General in the country. He has multiple distinguished lawyer awards and accolades.
Notable failures: Missed 11.3 percent of roll call votes in the Senate, which is relatively high. Out of 97 sponsored bills, only one was passed. Multiple lies/mistakes when quoting economic figures. Failure to disclose Goldman-Sachs loan when financing his campaign.
Social policy: Pro-traditional marriage. Anti-LGBT rights. Marijuana legalization is a state issue. Reduce sentencing for drug crimes. Common Core is ineffective. Abolish the Dept. of Education. Pro-NRA and gun rights.
Economic policy: Supports TPA. End corporate well-fare, install a flat tax of 16% to businesses large and small. Repeal ObamaCare. Eliminate payroll tax, death tax, business tax, and the IRS.
Foreign policy: Syrian refugees cannot enter America. Enforce current laws against illegal immigrants in America. No diplomatic relations with Cuba. Help Ukraine with sanctions against Putin. ISIS is more concerning than Assad. Stop nation building in Afghanistan.
That wraps up the summary of our most likely candidates to see the Oval Office. Each person listed has various faults and shining points to offer us, the decision of which of those constitute getting elected president is ultimately our call. While I joke and lament on how voting this year is a scary and nauseating idea, it is the only way to continue on our perfectly imperfect system of democracy. Do you research, friends, and make sure you vote!
