“Who is she to make the rules as to what’s right vs. wrong?” (Little secret: I am no one to make the rules.)But I am taking it on as a “duty” to convince you that I know them. Below I am simply stating my opinions. This is in reference to everyday accounts, not food blogs, workout gurus, top models, or the account you made for your dog, etc. You get it.
How to post a selfie?
Should you even post selfies? I say go for it, but keep it to once a year. I am talking a true definition selfie, a close up of solely your face purposely posted to present yourself in an “attractive way.” (Selfie stick your heart out but it’s only gonna kill that trend faster.) If I follow you, chances are I know what you look like; great lighting and on point makeup aren’t going to change my perceptions. Don’t be shameful of a selfie, good for you that your snapchat game is strong, cough cough snapchat (not Instagram), just limit it.
“Look at me at this party!”
“If you went out and didn’t post an Instagram… did you even go?” It comes down to this, if I know every dress/skirt you own, there’s a problem. If your location is “At (insert local bar) you already know”… well need I say more? I am not saying never do it! That would only make me a hypocrite. Hey if I get a good picture with my best friends **capturing me rarely dressed up** you can bet I’ll post it. If your life’s purpose is to show you have a social life at least make it funny. One time I saw girls dressed up as full on dinosaurs at a “decades” themed party, and quite honestly that’s gonna get my double tap, and not the picture of girls in dresses and flower headbands.
Birthday Picstich
We’ve all made them. But we all know the only reason they get likes from anyone except for that person is out of pure kindness. No one is going to take the time to look through 20 collaged photos that sadly took a significant amount of time to put together. PSA if the person you post one for doesn’t have an Instagram (probably your grandma), then I say pick up a phone and call her instead. Unless she's turning 100 then go grandma! But hey when it comes down to it, it’s the thought that counts.
Love life
“Me and bae.” “Missing bae.” “Cuddle time.” “Look who bought me dinner.” If you need me I will be slamming my head against a table. If you have managed to make me hate your relationship without having even met your significant other, then a line has mostly likely been crossed… that line being more than a handful of pictures of you two being posted! A stomach turning cute picture here and there might make me shed a tear, but only out of jealously.
The Sky
It’s pretty crazy but most buildings have windows, which usually means without checking Instagram someone most likely knows what the clouds looked like that day. A sunset picture here and there is fine, but I recommend you post it when you’re on vacation. I only say that because we all know “a breathtaking” sunset in your hometown is going to take up the feed for three scrolls, so there goes any chances of being unique.
Flex Zone
I shouldn’t know what the inside of your gym bathroom looks like. A weekly update on the process of your abs is not necessary because you can bet I'm scrolling by it as I stick another spoonful of ice-cream in my mouth. I am a strong believer in being active but an even stronger believer in doing it for yourself. Don’t run the extra mile for a better picture to show to world, run it so you can prepare yourself for a freak bear attack in the future! If you have a body to show off wait until you’re at the beach to capture it.
“Don’t do this, don’t do that… blah blah blah.”
What makes for a good Instagram?
Food, do it justice and make it look good! Pizza is pizza… I will always like pizza.
Pets, if animals don’t make you happy then you have bigger issues.
Travel, don’t let “do it for the Insta” ruin your trip, but I love seeing pictures from around the world, it lets me adventure through you.
Artwork, babies, sky diving, running a marathon (ha), a throwback with your sibling…
…The list goes on and on, use your Instagram to show people you’re interesting! Different is cool, shout out to all you hipsters. Capture amazing moments but then put your phone away and actually live in them.
