Many people handle singlehood differently. It's just a fact. Some scream "why!" into their pillows as Celine Dion blares through speakers. Others grow distant and glare in the mirror, deliberating all past conversations. Others party. Hard. And then there are the ones that sit back and enjoy. I'm the last and I always have been. I chose at a very young age to refrain from dating just to date. I'm not entirely sure what spurred this other than witnessing my friends cry themselves to sleep over someone else's opinion of them. It was hogwash to me then and it's hogwash to me now. I don't know how old you are and I don't know your past, I probably don't even know your present accurately, but I do know that it is my wish, whoever you are and however I know you, to explain the amazing power behind embracing your single season. Even if that season is just a month, a year, or like me, a lifetime (so far).

Let's talk about Valentine's day. When I was little, I loved Valentine's day. It was filled with so much magic. My mom used to hang this flag in my front yard that was decked out in pink and red hearts and I would stare at it move in the wind all the time. We used to make an annual heart shaped cake too, but my most favorite thing were the Valentine's Day cards I made for my classes. Now, let's talk about middle school. In middle school, the flag got raggedy and my mom never actually replaced it, so I stopped watching it flow in the wind. And while we still made the cake, and it was still delicious, the cards in school were no longer mandatory. The love was no longer "Hey, you're my friend and I like the pink marker you write with," it was "Hey, you're pretty, I'm pretty, let's hold hands." And then, ladies and gentlemen, I loved the holiday a bit less.

This little anecdote served as a simple introduction to the pushy, annoying world that evolved too soon. Also known as dating. My problem isn't actually the dating part (surprising, I know). My problem is the pushy part and the fact that in this world, the absence of a significant other for most people means sadness, loss, and the demolition of self confidence. That is where my problem lies. You shouldn't put your self worth in places that are not forever, especially places that involve faulty humans. I am not saying relationships are bad. I fully recognize the purpose and reason of them. I am simply speaking to the person who has ever been in a single season and felt the societal pressures of having to move on to the next person, just because.

Now, society. It is a scary place, but we all have to deal with it. It is a current of insecurities, pushing and pulling and pushing and pulling. If you aren't careful, you'll get sucked up in it and travel too far from the safe shores. I say this because I have seen it and I say this because I am lucky enough to have a voice and the urge to use it.

You don't need someone else to be someone, yourself.

You can be you, without him. You can be you, without her. And I think it important to figure out the you that you are when no one else is around. I think it important to find the you that is there in the morning, the you that is there at night, and the you that is there in between. At the end of it all, you have yourself. People, too often, try so hard to be someone else's, they forget to be their own person. To me, that's scary.

We, as a people, are so sociable and so affectionately greedy. It's like when you try to guess a dog's thoughts as he's jumping around, trying to get your attention. You picture him shouting "LIKE ME! LIKE ME!" Only that isn't the dog, okay? That is us. And that's fine and dandy until it jeopardizes who we are inside. It is vital where we put our self worth. If we are constantly putting ourselves on hold for other people's opinions and wants and wishes, we never get a call through. We never get anywhere.

You must give yourself time to know yourself, find yourself, care for yourself. And it doesn't work so well if you are never with yourself. So, embrace it.

I understand the want of company. I understand the readiness of being reminded your face is attractive daily. But, I don't understand the perishing fear that encompasses most when they are faced with single-hood. It isn't the end of the world. It's a chance to create your own. A place you can fill with what you love and what you know. A place you can grow and change to better yourself. It's not a bad place to be and after you live there for a bit, you find things like power and self love. I say it's worth a wait. I say it's worth a season or two.