Poetry On Odyssey: Love Yourself

Poetry On Odyssey: Love Yourself

A poem for me, about me, to me.

At 15 I never thought of love

At 13 I lost my Serenity

At 15 I lost plenty

My fight has always been against me

Self-sabotage has been the tea

Sipping on my issues within myself

Asking for the one that never tears up help

Funded education by the grant called Pell

State of Illinois has saved this kid many times

Education has better this mans rhymes

Every year a letter of more and more doubt is signed

As the years go, so does my mind

In a way that you may think is fine

To where the child is the man

To where there is a plan

The plan is magnificent in its making

To where people are generally interested and not faking

There is a book

It has been laid out by the cook

The cook is me

It is everything I have ever needed for me

Bridging the wide gap between imagination and reality

It’s healthy it’s my green tea

My whole life I have felt unfree

Free and unfree but belonging to nobody

Spelling out confusion in this life like a spelling bee

Calling on others, myself, and hate with no caller id

Mysterious veils of truths shrouded in emotionally wrote hyperboles

Be safe and confine in me

Be me and deny in me

Be me and win in me

Be me and lose it all with me

Be me and crush everyone with me

Be me and come back with me

Be me and try next time with me

Sit off in the distance and sail the Caribbean Sea

Caribbean Sea inhabit-anted by me

By my hopes and dreams

You would see the positive and negative extremes

You would see the effect of many regimes

You would get to see my life and it’s theme

You would see that everyone has their teams

As you sail the sea you will see me flying by the waves

Because to energy I am a slave

Always always somehow sending shockwaves

Because it’s the experience that saves

Waiting waiting for me to fall to my grave

Growing up is such a hard thing to do

At 23 I have gained and lost everything

At 23 I am me

At 23 I will win everything

Me At 23 you will see

In 2018 winning is me and today I am winning

Cover Image Credit: Bryon Pierson

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Don't Wait Until You Have Everything Figured Out, Find Your Bliss Now

Life is very beautiful, and we shouldn't let it pass by without first experiencing its beauty.

Ever since high school, I have delayed gratification because I want to have everything figured out before experiencing happiness. The majority of the time, I choose homework over parties, office hours over lunch dates, and saving money over treating myself. This might not sound all that bad, however, I am never really enjoying life, I am always "torturing" myself before I can experience even the slightest bit of happiness.

Please, do not be like me. Don't wait until your life is "perfect" to experience happiness. If you happen to fall in love with someone, and if they treat you with kindness, let that love develop. Don't stop it because you are not financially stable or even emotionally stable. If you really love this person and if they love you back, you can work on those things together.

Similarly, if your friends invite you to the movies or mall, go with them, and enjoy your time with them. Homework can wait sometimes. Make time in your day to do the things you love because the day only has 24 hours, and those hours sure go by fast.

Do not wait until you are old and can barely move to do the things you love. Do those things now before it's too late. Your death is a mystery, you can die now, tomorrow, or in fifty years. There is no exact date of when your death is, therefore, find your bliss now before you're gone forever.

On a more positive note, life is very beautiful, and we shouldn't let it pass by without first experiencing its beauty. We have to find our bliss now, not never. If your bliss, like mine, involves traveling, shopping, spending time with friends, or having spontaneous photo shoots, then do just that. Just live your life to the fullest, and don't wait, like I often do, to experience happiness. Find your bliss now!

Cover Image Credit: Twitter

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Defending Myself Against "Resting Bitch Face"

No, really...it's just my face.

If I had a nickel for every time somebody told me that I was not as intimidating, scary, or mean as I looked...I might actually graduate with no debt.

Unfortunately, that is not the case.

However, it is just my face that causes these misunderstandings. Welcome to the daily life of a girl with persistent "Resting Bitch Face."

Seriously. I know that sounds like a classic example of depreciation but it really is something I have just come to accept.

"Resting Bitch Face," as it has been so lovingly termed, has played a role in my social interactions for as long as I can remember. People that have gotten to know me better over the years have almost always said something along the lines of "you know...you aren't as scary as I thought you would be" or "you're so much nicer than I thought you would be" or even "I was really afraid of you before I got to know you."

As long as you avoid the classic "you should try to smile more," I don't mind these comments. I know that my facial expression (or lack thereof) can sometimes be a little intimidating. Trust me, I know what my face looks like when I'm bored, focused, or even just relaxed.

I wouldn't talk to me either at these points if I didn't know my own true personality.

In fact, I believe I can partially blame myself for this perception. I was not a very fun person throughout my sophomore and junior years of high school and that definitely did not help. Stress got to me as I worried about getting into college, passing my APs, and getting a hefty amount of scholarship offers (perfectionist 101 was a course I should have not only gotten credit for but taught during these years).

Once I learned that these things were important but were not worth the amount of stress that I placed on myself, I started to feel a little more relaxed. Maybe my "RBF" relaxed as well during this time because I've noticed that fewer people have told me that they were currently afraid to approach me, but I continue to get comments that they had been in the past.

To those people, I'm glad you decided to take the risk that I might "rip your face off" and talked to me. I promise it really is just my face...I am (at least I like to believe I am) really a nice person. All it takes is a little bit of conversation to soften the RBF and break into my true personality. I'm shy and that doesn't help this predicament but I'm working on it. Once I get to know people and start talking, it can be hard to get me to shut up.

Just remember: for every hateful expression, there is an equal and opposite happy (and probably goofy) expression.

Cover Image Credit: https://www.pinterest.com/pin/486177722265505937/

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