I totally get you. Being a planner is not just about color-coding your beautiful planner--though that is key. It’s also about mentally planning every single thing that happens in life: a date, an errand, even a conversation. This planning leads to having crazy expectations for every single thing possible. And when that doesn’t happen… Bad things. Very bad things. It feels like it’s OCD and anxiety rolled into one. “This is what will happen and this has to be what happens otherwise it’ll mess up and it can’t mess up it really can’t or else…” Yeah. I get it.
If you’re like me, you may be friends with or date people who are the exact opposite of you. My boyfriend is very “whatever you want to do, it doesn't matter” which doesn't always go well with me. My best friend is totally fine with making a plan and then changing it once we get together.
When I say I’ve got my life figured out, really I mean I have it laid out when I will graduate, when I will get married, and when I will begin taking the next step with my husband of furthering our careers-which goes with my plan of what careers we will have.
Making plans and organizing my life is not a bad thing. The bad part is that my reaction to things not going “my way” is to become overly stressed and frustrated and sad. I know, I don’t get it either.
Something that I am constantly having to remind myself is that it is NOT up to me. My plan is NOT what God is going by. In fact, He probably finds it pretty funny when I pray that things go according to what my planner says. (And this is actually probably a good thing because who knows where I would and with whom if I got to decide…)
Because in truth, God already has a plan that is far greater than my own. He is going to do (and is already doing) incredible things with our lives. And often times it’s not necessarily what I would choose. Proverbs 19:21 says, “Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will stand.” So I can plan my life away but God is still going to write over my words.
God is the Master Planner. From the beginning of time (way long ago) He knew that He would send us Jesus. Jesus’ sacrifice was never plan B. And God knew exactly what would happen after that. The Bible says that before we’re even formed in our mother’s womb God has a plan for our lives.
It is so hard to turn over the control completely to God. I can tug on it all I want or just keep thinking that I’ve got it, but I never actually have. God has always, is always, and will always be sovereign.
So how can you let go of what you have planned for your life? Well if you haven't already, give your life to Christ; repent of your sins and accept His gift of salvation. After that, read the Bible daily to see His plan. Basically, we are all called to spread His message, and eventually He will show you how you're going to do that. Continue to pray for an obedient heart. Talk to fellow believers and pray together. We have all been adopted into God’s family, which means we’re there for each other.
It is going to be difficult. But God is very generous with His mercy, in that it never stops. He is patient beyond measure. And He LOVES you with an all-consuming, steadfast love. He gave you this heart of planning and following a plan for a reason--He’s going to use that gift.
His ways are greater than my ways, His plan is greater than my plan. I have to make it a daily thing to breathe and let God work. I know that in the end He will use be for better things than I could ever dream of.
Proverbs 16:9 “The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps.”
