In our digital age, we love sharing photos of ourselves, hence the term “selfie.” I love selfies, and I usually have to restrict myself from taking and posting unnecessary ones, but the challenges that have risen since this new selfie age are concerning. I don’t mean “challenge” as in difficulties, I mean those “Man Crush Mondays,” “Woman Crush Wednesdays,” “Throwback Thursdays,” and “Flashback Fridays.” Those are all understandable, seemingly harmless, but one frightens me more than any: “Transformation Tuesdays.” The idea of Transformation Tuesday is to post a picture of yourself from years ago when you considered yourself awkward looking paired with a picture of yourself currently where you are all glammed out. Many people have pictures of themselves they may not like; I too find pictures where I regret something I wore or regret the hairstyle I chose. The problem is we may look at our former selves in the wrong way.

Although I may regret certain pictures, I certainly will never regret or forget the experiences that shaped me at that time. Born and raised in North Carolina as a minority, I was always among the few and I struggled with a lot of insecurities. Moving to Philadelphia, I slowly began to appreciate who I really am inside and out. Now finishing college, I feel confident about who I am, what I look like, (with some lingering insecurities; it’s natural), and things I have yet to learn. I would never take away the experiences I had in North Carolina because they furthered my understanding of the world today. Some things you just can’t read in a book, it takes experience. “Transformation Tuesday” hardly ever considers those experiences, it only looks at the outward appearance. My outward appearance in my younger days was a result of trying to fit in; that’s worth talking about.

As a result of Transformation Tuesdays, somehow we allowed the #Don’t Judge Challenge to slip in. This challenge, again seemingly harmless, had thousands, (maybe millions?) of kids and teens everywhere drawing what we, in America, consider ugly features onto their faces. This included fake glasses, red dots like pimples, acne cream, uni-brows drawn on with black markers, missing teeth and more. They made silly faces with their “ugly look,” and when the camera blacks out, the person comes back to the screen with fabulous makeup and hair and in their best clothes. How can we be lighthearted about that challenge? There are millions of people that struggle with acne, hair issues, and anything else we consider ugly features. And while some have to struggle with those kinds of insecurities, people who participated in that challenge took advantage of the fact that they don’t have outward-appearance issues. There is a difference between confidence and narcissism.

I know there are many people who use Transformation Tuesday to shed light on their journey to health, and they should celebrate that! This was commentary on those who use it to bash their younger selves. So the next time you choose to participate in challenges that allow you to look down on your own appearance, or someone else’s, think about what you were like in that picture; how happy you were just being a child, just being alive, how scared you were, how confident you felt. Consider who you were then and who you are now. Appreciate your former self; you wouldn’t be who you are without it.