Four months ago I made a choice to change my lifestyle and dietary habits forever. I decided to become a vegetarian. Now this was in no way an impulsive decision and I did not stop eating meat "cold turkey" (haha, get it?). I spent countless hours researching and pondering what it would be like once I made this conversion. Would I be too weak to resist temptation? Would the undying urge to eat meat haunt me until I broke? Would I feel all queasy and guilty if I gave in? Would I g- Ok you get it by now, I'm sure! The fact of the matter, honestly, is that it hasn't been that hard. Four whole months have gone by and i haven't had the slightest urge to eat meat. Surprisingly, I've been more tempted to try new veggies than I've been to consume meat.
BUT WAIT!
There is another urge. One that I've failed to mention.. an urge that I have refused to act on and simply must share. Out of four months of being a vegetarian I have resisted the urge to tell inquisitors and critics how it is. Instead I've chosen to use their sometimes pointless inquisitions and comments to teach them a thing or two about the vegetarian lifestyle. Here are the seven most common questions and phrases that I've encountered during my newly-veg stages. I've broken each one down and listed how I feel we vegetarians would like to respond and how I personally have responded to these scenarios.
1. Well what do you eat then!?
How we’d like to answer:
Oooo! This is an easy one... try vegetables you moron, or any other freakin’ thing that’s not meat! For Pete’s sake, use your brain! Try context clues even! You do know what those are, right?
How I choose to answer:
Well there are multiple types of vegetarians: (1) semi-vegetarians, (2) lacto vegetarians, (3) Lacto-ovo vegetarians, and (4) vegans. I happen to be a (3) lacto-ovo vegetarian, so my diet excludes red meats, fish and poultry, but includes things like eggs, milk, ice-cream, cheese, and yogurt.
2. (Insert perplexed look here) WHY!!!?
How we’d like to answer:
WHY DOES IT MATTER? HUH? WHY!? Am I going around probing and asking everybody that I see devouring meat why it is that they are doing so? The answer is no, I’m not, am I? So please, just please don’t do it to me. Is that too much to ask?
How I choose to answer:
Honestly, I decided to become a vegetarian because I wanted to change my eating habits and make my life healthier. I’ve never been a huge consumer of meat products, so I figured I could make it as a vegetarian. Contrary to popular belief, it’s not always for the animals, and I admit that initially it wasn’t, but since then the animals have become a major contributor to my continuation.
3. I couldn't bare eating salads every day.
How we’d like to answer:
Well, sweetheart, if you would take a few minutes to actually culture yourself you’d know that vegetables are capable of fashioning a lot more than just salads. For crying out loud, do you honestly think that the only thing in a vegetarian’s recipe book is a salad?
How I choose to answer:
Oh no, there are a lot more options out there than salads. Vegetarians have an array of food options and recipes to choose from such as black bean burgers, tofu, textured vegetable protein (soy meat) and a slew of produce to choose from. In fact, many of your everyday meals can be eaten by vegetarians. That is, after a few major tweaks in the recipe of course.
4. Just pick the meat off
How we’d like to answer:
What did you just say to me? That is literally one of the most offensive phrases that you could ever utter. You would like me to pick off all of the cooked pieces of carcass that have excreted their juices and oils all over the remainder of this dish and then eat it? Are you serious right now?
How I choose to answer:
Although some people may be comfortable with that, I’m not. It’s the principle of the matter, so I just can’t do that.
5. This is just a phase. You’ll be eating meat again in no time.
How we’d like to respond:
No, you twit, this is not a phase. It’s something that I am really passionate about actually. There’s this thing called faith that you obviously have never heard of. You should have a little.
How I choose to answer:
Well only time can tell that, but I’m really happy with my lifestyle. I can see this lasting a long time, so be supportive.
6. One person can't save all the animals in the world.
How we’d like to answer:
No crap, Sherlock. I surely hope that you don’t think that I’m the only one on the planet that’s doing this. If so, I recommend you that you wake and smell the freaking dietary diversity!
How I choose to answer:
There are actually approximately 7.3 million people in the world that follow a vegetarian based diet, so I assure that I am not alone.
7. You just need a good hamburger or steak.
How we’d like to respond:
…………………………numb-skull.
How we choose to respond:
Haha! Actually, I’ve never been overly fond of either of those, so I know what I’m missing.
*This article does not reflect the views of the entire vegetarian community nor does it speak for it.*
