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I Pay For My Friends

The Myths and Truths about fraternity life

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I Pay For My Friends
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I tend to get philosophical during keg stands. There's something about the smell of sweat, Busch Lite, and shame that just gets me thinking about my choices in life. The first one being, how did I end up in a frat? I'm a scrawny theater kid from suburbia. I've never been in a real fight. I can't chug a beer. I once skipped my homecoming dance to go compete in a Magic: The Gathering tournament. I never thought of myself as "frat material." So how did I get here?

I had a lot of preconceptions about fraternity life prior to college, mostly from Van Wilder and Animal House, so I doubted I'd ever join one. I mean, a drinking club made up of testosterone-addled business majors in salmon shorts? No, thank you. Not for me.

I got through freshman year about as well as any freshman can, not really going out to parties, not even drinking, just staying in and playing Civilization V for several consecutive months. So far so good. But my sophomore year, an upperclassman from the fencing club invited me to a pregame, as well as the following frat party. I had beaten every video game on my computer twice over by this point, so I thought, "Okay, let's do this." After overdressing, then underdressing, then overdressing again, I headed over to his dorm. I walked in and saw four guys in sweatpants playing Super Smash Bros.

"Hey," my upperclassman said. "grab a drink and a controller. Ya gotta take a drink every time you lose a stock. Who's your main?"

I was home.

Being in such a friendly and familiar scenario, I never felt pressured or cowed by the frat guys I was hanging with. This was something I did all the time, so it felt natural. As I started coming out more and more, showing up to rush events, playing video games and chatting with brothers, and getting a feel for the fraternity, I came to the realization that so many of the rumors and stereotypes I had about fraternities were just myths. Here are a few of those myths:

(Full disclosure: I can't speak for every fraternity in America; I can't even speak for every fraternity in Geneseo. But I can speak for myself, and that's exactly what I'm doing.)

Frat Guys do nothing but drink

I'm calling this one a half-truth; to say that social drinking isn't a part of fraternity life is like saying that pasta isn't a part of Italian cuisine. However, fraternities are a lot more than a drinking club. Both on campus and off, fraternities engage in community service, philanthropy, fundraising events, various workshops, and general charity. According to the Center for the Study of the College Fraternity (CSCF), Greek Life undergraduate students donate over $7 million and 850,000 hours of community service annually. Additionally, they give over four times the amount in donations to their alma maters as non-greek alumni.


Frat Guys are dumb

Okay, so jumping out of a window onto a pong table may not seem like something a smart person does, but hear me out. According to the CSCF, the all-fraternity average GPA is a 2.971--a small step up from the all-male average of 2.844, but a step nonetheless. In addition, members of greek organizations graduate at a rate of 71% nationally, compared to the average graduation rate of 60%, according to the Department of Education. Another fun fact while I'm at it-- all of the members of the Apollo moon landing were from greek organizations, although I'm speculating that Buzz Aldrin was just on a really, really extreme scavenger hunt.

You pay for your friends

I'll take that as a compliment. Got a house full of homies, why I feel so the opposite? (If you got that Childish Gambino reference, A+). You pay for lots of things, but friends aren't one of them. You pay for drinks, for decorations, for budgeting activities and events, for maintenance and more, but the friendships are entirely your own. It's really no different than paying dues for any other club--you're paying to keep the organization that you love functioning; the bonds you build and experiences you create are separate from the money you put in.

If someone had asked me, back in high school, about where I'd be today my answer would have been, "spending weekends playing Dungeons & Dragons, eating pizza for three meals a day, and browsing internet memes in my underwear." And I'd be exactly right. What I never expected is that I'd be able to do these things with a group of brothers, and then get positively shitfaced afterward. But that's just the reality we live in, right?

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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