Being single isn’t a bad thing by any means. As a young millennial in today’s society, it is so easy to feel like having a relationship is a necessity, what with the endless amount of photos and statements we approach on social media contributing to the opinion that love is worth throwing everything away for. That’s not to say that it isn’t, but I don’t agree that diving in quickly and head-first is the best decision for everyone.

The importance of knowing yourself and loving yourself before you try to know and love someone else is ignored all too often these days. I’ve spent over a year learning from mistakes that I’ve made with past friendships and relationships in order to evaluate who I am as a person and take every opportunity to mold myself into the person I want to be. Some people might be able to do that while in a relationship, but I definitely would’ve struggled. It took my heart getting a brutal beating from a man before I was able to realize that I must have the ability to make myself happy, and be content with my life as an individual, if I ever want to find happiness in the extra things.

Impatience is something I think almost everyone can relate to, especially in terms of finding happiness and love in another being. While it would be nice to be spoiled and shown off by your significant other, think of how confident, comfortable and alive you will seem if you are able to do this all for yourself. I would much rather know that I’m fully capable of bringing joy into my life than feel in my heart the longing for another person to do such things for me. Falling in love with yourself is one of the greatest things we can do for God. You are falling in love with a creation that He is so unbelievably proud of. He is writing our love story this very moment, whether we want to acknowledge it or not. You may be incredibly happy with someone right now who won’t be able to make you happy when you wake up next to them in a few months. You may be finally seeing the positives in your life as a single woman/man, but that could change if you muster up the courage to give the looker across the room your number for the hell of it.

The importance of all of this is comfortability. Being comfortable in a relationship with yourself is essential in being comfortable with someone else. As soon as you learn to love the time you spend alone but acknowledge the new and exciting feelings you get when you’re with somebody for the first time, the more likely you are to find a balance and develop a beautiful and healthy romantic relationship. Love is a beast. It is a beast that will eat your heart out, fill every crack that anyone or anything has ever left in it, or do both simultaneously. It brings pain, and it brings happiness. By forcing yourself into the belly of the beast before you know you’re absolutely ready, you hurt more than just your heart. Be patient and accepting of the time it is taking for your love story to pan out. The wait will not be for nothing. Something as beautiful as love is worth the wait, and most definitely worth the effort.