Some people have said that when your parents tell you to “stop dating someone” because they aren't good for you, it causes you to want that person even more.
That is not the case for me. I would say my parents know me pretty well, I mean they did raise me and all. They know me well enough to know exactly how I should be treated and ultimately who I should be with.
A couple years ago, my parents sat me down and told me that I should end things with the guy I had been dating for three years—we like to call that day “World War III”—and for a 17-year-old girl, that meant the end of my whole world. I didn’t want to break up with him, but my parents were firm about how they felt.
Now that I’ve started a new chapter in my life, being away at college and meeting so many new people, I can finally understand what they were trying to show me. Sometimes it takes an outsider's perspective in order to bring a lot of problems to light that you can’t see when you’re blinded by love.
My mom showed me that what I had was not love, just an aspect of it. If someone really loves you they would never put you in a position where you felt as if they didn’t. My dad showed me that there was not mutual respect nor was there any trust. In a healthy relationship, two people have to respect each other and trust each other in order for it to be considered a relationship at all.
Since then, I have become a lot tougher. I know how to stand up for myself, and I know what I want in a relationship. None of that would have ever happened if my parents had not intervened. Every guy I’ve dated since then has had to have their approval from the get-go, and that will be the case for the next guys that come along.
Your parents know you better than you know yourself, and they care about you more than anyone else. They want to see you with someone who makes you happy, but most importantly, someone who treats you with love and respect.
If my next lucky guy happens to read this, you know what to expect, and I do wish you luck. However, if you do end up making it past Mom, Dad, and my sister, just know that there’s a whole other crew you’ve got to get past... the cousins.
