What if we all treated ourselves the way we treat our best friends?
Negative self-talk is one of the most rampant issues people face today. With mental health issues such as anxiety and depression becoming so prevalent in even younger generations, it is important to acknowledge this dangerous trend.
I think it's becoming an increasingly prominent issue that people are more condemning of themselves than they are of other people. Where we would normally forgive someone's mistake; we tell ourselves that it is inexcusable. Where we would normally see someone's attractive qualities; we see only our flaws. Where we would normally be kind to someone who is suffering; we tell ourselves to get over it.
To this day, some of the best advice I have ever received when dealing with my depression came from a total stranger. He said, "talk to yourself the way you would talk to your best friend. If someone you loved was stuck in bed, too depressed to move, how would you approach them? Is that the same way you talk to yourself when times get hard for you?"
The simple answer is no, it's not. If someone I love is struggling, I approach them with gentleness, compassion, and kindness. I tell them that it's okay to be struggling and that it's all going to be okay soon. I offer to help them, try to cheer them up, and remind them what they mean to me.
Alternatively, when it's me stuck in bed; when the depression rolls in and I can't find the will to live, I berate myself. I insult and put myself down. I get angry and I start blaming myself for being too broken or too pathetic to function normally. It's devastating to my self-esteem and the way I see myself, and I know I am not the only person guilty of this.
So what would happen if we all treated ourselves the way we treat our best friends? What if the next time you can't get out of bed, you showed yourself some kindness? Some compassion? Some understanding? What if instead of blaming yourself, you just said: "hey, I know it's hard right now, but it's going to be okay?" What would happen?
