"Other People Have It Worse Than You Do."

"Other People Have It Worse Than You Do."

Rather than making others feel guilty about their feelings, start supporting those who need it.
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“You have nothing to be sad about, people have it so much worse than you do.” I have heard this statement far too many times and I think it’s time to emphasize just how hurtful and wrong it is.

First, let us take the concept of “people have it worse than you do” and apply it to another, pretty graphic situation. Two people just broke their legs in a soccer accident. However, one person managed to fracture their leg in three places while the other only fractured theirs in two places. Technically, Person A has it worse, so are you telling me Person B has no right to complain about their pain and suffering? I apologize for the disturbing example, but hopefully, it gets the message across. Technically, someone will always have it worse than you, but this does not, and I repeat, does NOT mean that you should feel guilty about being upset over your own circumstances.

You don’t always know what someone may be going through because many feel pressured to hide their problems. Just because the person seems to have a “perfect” life doesn’t mean that they aren’t struggling with something they are afraid to mention. It’s very possible that they have a personal issue. I mean, can you blame someone for not opening up? Society has become too damn judgmental and, in turn, has created a threatening and intimidating environment for those who need a helping hand.

For me, personally, it took years and years of effort to break the cycle of bottling up everything that was bothering me until I couldn’t handle it anymore. I cannot stress enough how detrimental this is to someone’s mental health. Before you go and tell someone they shouldn’t be upset, try to remember that you don’t know what happens behind closed doors.

Depression is cruel. I don’t know where the misconception that depression is “just a phase” came from, but it’s about time we end it. Biologically, depression occurs when there is a chemical imbalance or when an individual has a smaller hippocampus than others in the brain. With new research being conducted every day, I’m sure there is an abundance of other biological reasons as well, but for now, these are the most two well known. What happens in the brain is out of a person’s control, so telling someone to “cheer up” or to “just snap out of it” can actually be impossible to accomplish. Depression can affect absolutely anyone; the disease does not discriminate. It doesn’t matter if someone has good grades, a healthy family life, a happy relationship, or whatever else you can think of.

Depression, in my opinion, is one of the most brutal conditions because its victims are vulnerable and unable to prevent it from happening. Imagine waking up and immediately dreading having to get out of bed because you are so fatigued. Everything that once excited you has now lost its luster, further sending you into a melancholy state. As each day passes without feeling any better, you begin to lose hope that you’ll ever be able to pick yourself up. If you really want someone to feel better, try being sensitive and caring. Try offering nonjudgmental support. Try to end the stigma that causes depressed people to feel ashamed of their condition. Stop telling them that others have it worse because you are severely wounding their recovery processes.

So, next time you're about to tell someone that they have no reason to be upset, please consider the damage you will be causing.

Cover Image Credit: The Brooklyn Reader

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To The Friends I Won't Talk To After High School

I sincerely hope, every great quality I saw in you, was imprinted on the world.
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Hey,

So, for the last four years I’ve seen you almost everyday. I’ve learned about your annoying little brother, your dogs and your crazy weekend stories. I’ve seen you rock the awful freshman year fashion, date, attend homecoming, study for AP tests, and get accepted into college.

Thank you for asking me about my day, filling me in on your boy drama and giving me the World History homework. Thank you for complimenting my outfits, laughing at me presenting in class and listening to me complain about my parents. Thank you for sending me your Quizlets and being excited for my accomplishments- every single one of them. I appreciate it all because I know that soon I won’t really see you again. And that makes me sad. I’ll no longer see your face every Monday morning, wave hello to you in the hallways or eat lunch with you ever again. We won't live in the same city and sooner or later you might even forget my name.

We didn’t hang out after school but none the less you impacted me in a huge way. You supported my passions, stood up for me and made me laugh. You gave me advice on life the way you saw it and you didn’t have to but you did. I think maybe in just the smallest way, you influenced me. You made me believe that there’s lots of good people in this world that are nice just because they can be. You were real with me and that's all I can really ask for. We were never in the same friend group or got together on the weekends but you were still a good friend to me. You saw me grow up before your eyes and watched me walk into class late with Starbucks every day. I think people like you don’t get enough credit because I might not talk to you after high school but you are still so important to me. So thanks.

With that said, I truly hope that our paths cross one day in the future. You can tell me about how your brothers doing or how you regret the college you picked. Or maybe one day I’ll see you in the grocery store with a ring on your finger and I’ll be so happy you finally got what you deserved so many guys ago.

And if we ever do cross paths, I sincerely hope you became everything you wanted to be. I hope you traveled to Italy, got your dream job and found the love of your life. I hope you have beautiful children and a fluffy dog named Charlie. I hope you found success in love before wealth and I hope you depended on yourself for happiness before anything else. I hope you visited your mom in college and I hope you hugged your little sister every chance you got. She’s in high school now and you always tell her how that was the time of your life. I sincerely hope, every great quality I saw in you, was imprinted on the world.

And hey, maybe I’ll see you at the reunion and maybe just maybe you’ll remember my face. If so, I’d like to catch up, coffee?

Sincerely,

Me

Cover Image Credit: High school Musical

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Tanya Gold, Your Fatphobic Article Is Uneducated And Arrogant

BREAKING NEWS: Women come in all different shapes and sizes!

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Just recently, Nike released a plus-size mannequin at one of their stores in London that showed off their plus-size leggings and sports bra. And, because we live in a world where being fat or overweight or obese is somehow the worst thing in the world to some people, this has sparked a lot of discussion.

Tanya Gold wrote an article for The Telegraph saying that this mannequin “cannot run" and is “likely pre-diabetic" and “on her way to a hip-replacement." Not only is Tanya's article uneducated and poorly written, it's completely fatphobic and embarrassing.

What I would like to know is this: why can't plus-size women work out in Nike clothes just like a size 2 woman? People want to scream from the rooftops that plus-size women are fat because they don't exercise and when companies FINALLY start catering to plus-size women with clothes they can EXERCISE IN, people lose their minds and think that they're promoting obesity.

What are plus sized women supposed to work out in if they can't even wear Nike leggings without being fat-shamed?

Would you rather them wear jeans? Overalls? A parka, maybe? What about a garbage bag?

Let's also discuss the fact that being overweight doesn't equal being unhealthy, just like being at a “normal" weight doesn't make you healthy. Did you ever stop to think that some women have diseases that make them gain weight that they, in return, can't lose? Some women can eat salad for every single meal, seven days a week and they still can't lose weight.

Let's all say this together: SIZE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH FITNESS. Being thin doesn't equal being healthy and being overweight doesn't equal being unhealthy.

Everyone (and yes, I mean EVERYONE) should be able to be comfortable in their own skin AND in their clothes.

You can't sit and pout saying that fat people don't care about their health and then when they want comfortable clothes to wear while they're EXERCISING, hell has frozen over and how dare Nike cater to people who aren't a size 2.

Tanya, be honest with yourself. You aren't anywhere near a size 2, either, so where is all of this coming from? Are you self-loathing? Do you have some kind of internal fatphobia?

Pick a side, Tanya. You can't hate people who are overweight because you think that they aren't exercising and then when they do exercise and they get clothes that cater to them, it's all of the sudden wrong and horrible.

We are damned if we do, damned if we don't. As if women (and men) weren't already being shamed enough for being plus size, we're now being made to feel bad because a brand caters to our size so we can wear the same clothes all of the other sizes can wear.

Thank you, Nike, for making your brand more inclusive for all shapes and sizes so we can ALL feel confident in our clothes.

I think it's worth mentioning that Nike released their plus-size line in 2017 AKA 2 years ago... Why weren't you mad then?

Oh, and, Tanya Gold, you might want to stop smoking since you're all about being healthy, right? You don't want to get lung cancer or anything, do you?

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