Middle School: arguably the most awkward portion of any modern adolescent's life. The best things about middle school were the friends I made and the fact that it was the place that I discovered my love of foreign languages and cultures (which would be the base for my undergrad majors). However, for the most part, I hated middle school. I hated the internal loneliness and self-loathing I constantly felt. I hated being so freaking tall. I hated being one of those girls who had a perpetual crush on someone who clearly wasn't interested in them. Most of all, I especially hated being called an Oreo.
For those of you who do not know what that means (although, I'm sure you all know by now), an Oreo is a term used by African-Americans to describe an African-American person who is “black on the outside but white on the inside” because they ‘talk white’ which is code for speaking what is deemed as proper English, like ‘white people stuff’ such as any other genre of music that isn't hip-hop or RnB.
When a black person calls another black person--especially when the people evolved are young--it does a lot of harm. This is a term that further divides us as a community. A term that places people into the category of other. It's a term that dehumanizes a person, reduces them to stereotypes, and fosters self-hatred within the person whom it's directed toward.
At least, it did for me. I was a kid who was already struggling with self-esteem issues because I didn't fit societal or cultural beauty standards. Sprinkle on a dash of bullying and a pinch of you're such an oreo’ and ‘bam!’ that is my seventh-grade year in a nutshell. I didn't feel like I had a space among fellow African-Americans to be who I was: a girl who loved to read. A girl who was a bit of a know-it-all, someone who was intelligent, liked all different types of music and someone was taught to speak properly. I think because I felt ostracized by my peers is partially why I did not have a lot of black friends until college and is why I remain the token black friend even today. It has taken me a long time to even begin to love and embrace my culture because of these experiences and while I'm still not cognizant of all of the good things God has allowed us to accomplish as a people and the furthest extent of the injustices that we bear, I'm glad that I am on a journey of education that is no longer hindered by this.
I have some questions for people who hold to the ideals of acting white and acting black; things that I have been wondering for years...and I'm sure I'm not alone.
Exactly...what is acting black? What is acting white? Doesn't subscribing to these ideals reduce yourself and countless others to a series of tropes that do not allow you to be but said tropes? In the same vein, if that is the case, wouldn't you want to be a dynamic human being like you were created to be? What's wrong with liking ‘white people stuff?’ Do you know that it's possible to like things that cross cultural divides and that it is okay to do so?
What is wrong with speaking the widely accepted form of English? Y'all know there's such a thing as code-switching right? Just because we don't constantly speak in AAEV doesn't mean we can't.
By calling someone an Oreo, do you realize that you do not allow them to feel comfortable enough to be themselves around you or in general? Do you realize that you can potentially help contribute to identity issues a person may have? Do you realize how psychologically damaging one little word can be?
Do you realize that when it all comes down to the wire we are bound to have the same experiences in this country because we're black? That it doesn't matter how properly we talk, how preppy we dress, how many degrees we have, or even how much money we have some people are still going to look at us as just another nigger? That you are sowing discord among our community instead of helping to build it the way we should be?
If anyone can answer these questions then by all means. I'm waiting for your answers.
