Hi, my name is Emily and I am in an open relationship. I've been dating this boy for 9 months now and I love him, but I didn't want to stop myself from meeting new people in a bigger pond, and he feels the same. I've been judged for my choice by many, called unrealistic or dumb, but right now it's what makes the most sense for us as a relatively new couple.
Basically, you have three choices when you're faced with this post-graduation dilemma: stay together exclusively, break it off entirely, or get into an open relationship. For those who may not know what this is, it is when the two of you remain emotionally attached and in constant contact, but you allow each other to experiment with other people, and individual rules can be applied depending on what you are comfortable with.
The thing you have to consider before making that final decision is whether you'd rather rely on logic or on your emotions. You could say it's a left-brained or right-brained decision but I'm no neuroscience major so I won't make that comparison.
Logically, an open relationship makes complete sense: it is so rare that your high school significant other will end up being the person you spend the rest of your life with. Naivety often plays a roll in our proclamations of love and commitment, especially when you've had very little experience as an 18-year-old. Because of this, you should widen your horizons, and what better place to do this than at university!? Experiment with other people and your bond with your high school love will either be proven weak or will grow stronger when you realize this person is the only one for you. Win-win right?
Wrong. Your emotions can take over and it is incredibly easy to be overcome with jealousy when you know other people are pining after your significant other. And even if you have no idea what they're doing, you could drive yourself crazy just thinking about all the possible scenarios they could find themselves in. Somehow I am an example of both of these cases.
The question you have to ask yourself is if they are worth it. Are they worth the stress, the anxiety, the jealousy? Because if they're not, let that sucker go. But in the small chance that they are, figure out what you are willing to sacrifice to keep the love alive.
Long-distance is difficult. Take it from someone who knows what they are talking about: try an open relationship. If it's not for you, at least you'll know.
Young love is stressful, man.
