Dear Squad,

I have no idea where I would be right now without you guys in my life. I can honestly say that you've changed my life for the better. Before I met all of you, I was a socially awkward girl who was strangely obsessed with the Backstreet Boys that only had one friend. Here we are almost a year later. I'm still pretty socially awkward and I'm still obsessed with the Backstreet Boys, but this time I have 5 crazy and amazing friends by my side. You all have seen me go through some good times and you've also seen me go through some pretty rough times, and I am extremely grateful that you stuck with me throughout the way.

I am an extremely flawed person and I will be the first to admit it. You guys have dealt with my random sass, my weirdness, my attitude when I'm hangry (which happens way more than often), and what I'm notorious for: my stubborn behavior. If you've ever found yourself questioning why I act the way I do sometimes, I'll help you get a better understanding of my craziness:

1. When I'm being stubborn, please never take it as a personal attack.

I've been through a lot of things in my past. I'm aware that everyone has their own battles, but we all cope with them differently. I naturally put my guard up whenever people try to get close to me, even the ones that love me the most. One of my biggest fears is not being seen as that strong, independent girl who never has to ask any for help once someone has seen my weak side. I know it may sound stupid, but it's always been something that I've believed. Just know that I'm trying every day to open up and accept help from those who I know mean no harm.

2. If I shut you out, please give me my time.

If there's anything that I do a lot, I shut people out. I build my walls so high that no one can get through to me, but instead of knocking them down right away, please give me my time to gradually take it down block by block. I'm the type of person who needs their alone time. It rejuvenates my soul in a way. If I ask to be alone, please let me be alone. I know you may think it's best for me to be around friends whenever I'm feeling sad, and although it's true sometimes, most of the time it becomes very emotionally draining. Once I'm ready to be around everyone again, you will always get the best version of me.

3. Finally, know that I love you all dearly even though I don't show it in a traditional way.

I can be very weird, we all know this. With some people I show love by being playfully mean to them and with others I just show my affection with hugs and kind words. Some days I like to mix it up and give everyone hugs and others I just like to call everyone "jerks". I'm honestly a ball of surprises and it can be confusing, but please bare with me. Never feel like you're the only one confused because I confuse myself with most of the things I do/say.

Words could never express how grateful I am for each and every one of you entering my life. Even though we are all each very different, at the end of the day we still love each other despite those differences. There is no other group of people I would rather spend every night laughing about the most stupid and random things with than you guys. Thank you for making me feel accepted, appreciated, and worthy of being loved every day of my life.