Dear Dad,
I write to you not only as your daughter, but also as one of the many people who have missed you for these last 13 years. You were the first man I ever loved. You held me, played with me, supported me, and gave me as many memories possible in those first seven years of my life. You believed in me first, gave me my first nickname, and especially gave me your height. You gave me all I could have ever needed in those seven years, because you gave me love. And by giving me love, you made me the person I am today.
Some days are harder than others, but I don't want you to worry. Most of the hard days involve me thinking about what you have missed out on and will continue to. Then those thoughts leave because I know that you will continue to go through life with me, just in a more special way. Just looking in the mirror every day is a reminder that you will always be the best part of me.
Mom is still a rock star. She has done an amazing job filling in for you. She still has trouble sometimes convincing people that I'm really her daughter since I'm tall with darker hair like you, and she is 5'2 and blonde. Then there are the people that have never met you so they say I look like her. After you passed away though, she decided she wanted to be a cop. I know; I thought it was a questionable career choice too, but it works for her. She went from being a rock star to a bad ass, and I know that both of us are proud of her.
I learned a lot about myself from your passing. I know this may be hard to hear, but after your death I matured. I suddenly had worries and fears that most seven-year-olds don't even consider. I thought about something happening to mom as well and struggled with separation anxiety. At the same time, I believe I became more independent. I had a lot of motivation to make you proud so I started playing a sport, graduated high school with an advanced studies diploma, got a scholarship to a beautiful college, joined many clubs to open myself up to many opportunities, and hopefully in one more year I will be a college graduate majoring in psychology. Your death made us a stronger family, it made us realize that together we are strong individuals who can conquer anything that life throws at us. You gave me the courage to never let anything get in my way and to just keep pushing forward, because I know you only wanted the best for us.
Nobody can understand the broken heart that comes from a little girl losing her father. While the initial wound goes away, the scars and bruises stay forever. Words can't describe how much I miss you. Just know that you'll always be in my heart and that every time I see a 6:23 on a clock, I'll think of you.
Love,
Your Bug
