One last goodbye, right before you leave. One last hug, because I won't ever see you again. I just want you back. You were my best friend. We always did the crazy stuff together. I miss you so much.

If I could have one wish, it'd be to have you back. For your heart to have been miraculously healed and for you not to be in pain anymore. I miss the little things we did together, like going to the mall or me getting my hair done. You were always by my side. God took you too soon. I know He had a plan, but it's what happened and I wish every night for you to be back here laughing at me and being silly with us.

One last laugh. Oh my, oh my I miss your laugh. I miss how you used to be silly with us and how you'd do goofy, crazy things. Like that one christmas that Cara got the nail painting kit and you let her paint your nails and toes that morning and walked around saying how beautiful she made you. That was one of my favorite memories ever. And if you could see her now, wow, daddy she is absolutely breathtaking. You'd be proud of all she's accomplished in her 13 years of life.

I remember this one summer. It was the summer before you passed. Our last family vacation. You knew my love for the beach. You'd call me the little mermaid because I loved the beach so much. Knowing how sad I'd be, you took a water bottle and filled it with sand and then with ocean water and you told me that I had a piece of the ocean. It was my favorite memory and I couldn't throw it out because it was our ocean. I still have it today.

One last hug. Your hugs were everything. They made everything better. It didn't matter what was wrong, you always made it better. I miss your scent when I hugged you. And no one can live up to your bear hugs. I miss how you'd be there cheering me on. And the first one to hug me when I got off stage.

All the memories I have of you are still here. I miss you so much. You never ever missed an All County concert or chorus concert in elementary and middle school. You were always there cheering me on. I remember the last concert before you passed away. You were so happy and so proud, you brought me flowers. You made me feel so special. You were my biggest cheerleader.

We had our differences but we always made it through. It's hard to think about sometimes. I'd get jealous of the daughters who had fathers and got to do so many special things with them. I'd think to myself, it's not fair that they have that life and I don't. It's not fair their dad will give them away but mine can't. It sucks. It truly, truly sucks.

I never in my life imagined losing my father on May 10th, 2008 at exactly 11:58am. I never once thought that it would happen. Everything that morning was perfect. Everyone was in a good mood. Dad was cooking pancakes for breakfast, mom was in the kitchen talking and laughing. I never thought that breakfast would be our last meal before my world was turned upside down. I was only 12 years old.

Now almost 9 years later, I am 20, sitting here writing about you. I know you're here. I feel your presence with me. I can truly say I have a guardian angel. I know some of my life choices haven't been the best, but I also know that we are human. We are not perfect. We make mistakes. We fall down. But I chose to stand up. I was raised by the strongest mother in the world. She inspires me daily because she does it all on her own. She is my hero. And I hope one day I can be half the woman she is.

Losing a parent at a young age isn't easy. In fact, it's incredibly difficult. Especially if you were close to them. You think how will you go on? You do. You have too. I believe everything happens for a reason. That God has a good reason for removing them. God knew he was sick and it took a long time for me to accept it. I had to keep a strong faith. And though it's hard, I know he's here with me today. Looking over me and smiling, looking over my sisters and my brother and my mother. He would be proud of our family today.

We miss you so much Dad, and I know you're not in pain anymore, but if I were to have one wish it'd be to see you again. To hug you again. I love you forever and ever and I'll see you again one day.