If I could tell you everything that’s going to happen, it would take me five years just to catch you up. So, I’ll make it brief and offer some small, but significant pieces of advice.
First off, you’re going to learn a lot. Yeah, yeah that’s what life’s about yada yada. Get to the “significant” part please.
Really though, you were just a little freshman in high school, who thought that the whole world was watching you. You thought that every little thing that happened moved mountains, when in reality it probably couldn’t even cut the grass. Every conversation with a cute boy ran through your head for days. On the weekends, you were busy doing some crazy dumb things with your friends. Not going to lie, you’ll make major mistakes with them, but you’ll make major memories as well. If I could tell you that the summer before your sophomore year may be the best summer so far in your life, would you believe me?
Spending weeks at a time over at friend’s houses. Going every possible place, even though you couldn’t drive. How did you even manage that? Who did you coerce into bringing you and all your obnoxious friends to these places? Mom and dad probably…Tell them thank you.
Exploring the lake. Practically living in a bikini. Taking advantage of that fact that you FINALLY seemed to be settling into puberty. No more awkward floppy arms or legs. Pimples? Ha… Well, actually you probably had a few pimples. Ooo, and braces still, yuck. That’s okay, you got them off by junior prom. Ninth grade you looked like a Miss America contestant compared to eighth grade. Funny how things changed so fast. Funnier how they change even faster now. Small choices you make are going to alter your path. Embrace it. It will all work out as it should.
Like sunscreen! Why didn’t you wear sunscreen back then? Seriously, you burnt the toast out of your skin. You’re paler than a milkshake in a snowstorm why did you think it was okay to use tanning oil?! These ugly freckles on my face now will never forgive you.
Why did you give your time a day to those guys who always hurt you? It was so silly. To be wrapped up in a boy, when you should have been wrapped up under your blankets reading a good book. Haha oh my goodness, you would flip if you knew that my definition of fun is lying in bed all night.
If only I could warn you not to take relationships so seriously. I mean, c’mon, they were ridiculously immature. It wasn’t the end of the world. He wasn’t your world. He was stupid. Still, you got your heart broken over and over and over and over. You might have thought it was love, but letting you cut in the lunch line with him didn’t make him the Romeo to your Juliet.
Remember when you got that C in English? You got in up though by the end of the year, but man. High school was a lot harder than middle school, right? I’ll be honest you never read "To Kill a Mocking Bird," but in tenth and eleventh grade you were determined to be a better student.
“You have to get in to a good college!” mom yelled at you seemingly every day.
You stepped it up, and hey, "Animal Farm" was actually pretty good.
Wanna know the greatest thing to have come from the worst broken heart you’re going to have junior year? Understanding self-love. Yeah. SELF. LOVE. He wasn’t your Romeo… it clearly wasn’t worth killing your character for him. You gave it your all, but you lost yourself because of it. Insecurities overpowered reason and rationality. Stop trying to think that that was the way it had to be. That it was always going to be that way… for the rest of your life.
Stop right there because that’s crazier than Donald Trump at a GOP Debate (I don’t wanna talk about this one). Life isn’t concrete. Things. Change. I said it before. Faster and faster each year, actually. You’re going to lose people and gain others. Those people by your side right now aren’t going to be there like you think they are. You’ll remember the memories, but the middle names, the birthdays, the phone numbers, those will be lost. The endless weekends spent in bikinis? Not anymore.
I know it sounds scary, but it was for the best. Losing them cleared away the clutter in your brain. The toxicity that sank deeper than the BP Oil Spill (oh yeah, get ready to be upset about that) seemed to vanish and in the midst appeared what truly mattered. It was cowering underneath, waiting for you to come save it.
It’s this moment you’ll learn quickly that loving yourself is the key to loving anybody else. It’s this moment you’ll learn quickly who values your character and shares your morals and who was just there for the ride.
It’s hard, it didn’t come without consequences, and you’re still learning. You may think that in five years you’ll have it all figured out. You probably think by now you defied odds and are living in Fairy Tale Mountain with 30 cats. The cat part is actually almost accurate, but the rest? No. Yet, everything is okay.
Oh, and never listen to the people that tell you high school is the best four years of your life. Don’t let them warn you that you’ll miss it, because guess what? You won’t.
College is so much better. For you, at least. I’m still working on a few things. The journey hasn’t ended yet, even like you thought it would. Learning self-love, among many other things, is an endless road trip. There’s potholes and blown out tires sure, but on the way you get to see canyons, rivers, cities, places and people you never thought existed… Like that really yummy Mexican restaurant with the perfect chips and salsa.
Don’t be so hard on yourself when you realize your dreams have changed. Don’t let others dictate your worth. Don’t be afraid to reach out when you need help.
Most importantly, don’t give up. There’s so much out there that’s worth waiting for.
