An Open Letter To Anyone Who Has Lost A Friend
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

An Open Letter To Anyone Who Has Lost A Friend

You never really get over someone, you just get used to them being gone.

An Open Letter To Anyone Who Has Lost A Friend

Words are amazing. They can talk for you when you don’t know what to say. They can make you feel emotion. And they can represent a plethora of other things for a person. To me, words are how I cope with many things, including sadness. A year ago, I experienced a sadness I’ve never felt before. I experienced a loss.

Losing anyone in your life is traumatic. And it can make you feel dark inside. Loss can make you feel like something is physically gone. Along with losing someone, you feel like you lose a part of yourself. It can make you feel like you can’t breathe and something inside you is just weighing down your lungs. It can make a black hole appear and suck down every bit of happiness you once had. Loss can make you feel ways you wouldn’t wish on your worst enemy and it sucks.

But the one good thing that comes from a loss is support. Support from family, support from friends and even support from strangers. This support shows you the good that is left in the world, when you can’t see anything but bad. It’s an incredible feeling to be supported, especially when you are at your lowest point.

When I lost my friend, I couldn’t sleep. I would lie in bed at night thinking of all the things I wish I had said and all the things I wish I could have done. I would think about her family and how they must be feeling. I would think about her best friends and all the people who were missing her as much as I was. But over time, I came to realize I couldn’t change anything, and that was probably the hardest thing to understand. No matter what I did, no matter what I said, I couldn’t bring her back. I was hopeless. But, I wasn’t alone.

My friend would always find ways to end up in my thoughts. Sometimes it was a song I heard on the radio and other times it was a picture that sparked a memory. She wasn’t with me physically, but she was with me. Knowing that made things get better. Knowing that she could still be a part of my life without physically being there was the greatest satisfaction I could ask for. A person’s soul doesn’t die with them. It lives in everything you do and everything you see.

My friend got a saying tattooed on her ribs before she passed that said, “Will you live or simply exist?” This friend lived and she lived well and she lived love. And that is how anyone who passes should be remembered -- for exactly who they were. They may be in a different place, but who they are isn’t different.

When you lose someone, it’s easy to lose yourself. You can lose yourself in doubt, in sadness, and in desperation. But I’ve learned that you can find yourself in that person again. You can find happiness. You can find ways to make yourself feel better. And you will. It’s not a matter of getting over the loss of someone but rather it is coming to terms with it. You never really get over someone, you just get used to them being gone.

So to all of those in the world who have lost a friend, know that it gets better. The pit in your stomach won’t always be there and the tears won’t always fall from your eyes. When you look back on memories and photographs you’ll learn to smile. And you’ll learn that it’s okay to smile. You’ll be okay. It will all be okay.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

college students waiting in a long line in the hallway

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments