An Open Letter Of Guidance To My Younger Sister

An Open Letter Of Guidance To My Younger Sister

want you to know I am so beyond proud of you and how many things you have accomplished so far.
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To My Little Sister,

I wanted to devote my first time writing to you for many reasons. First, I want you to know I am so beyond proud of you and how many things you have accomplished so far. I wanted to write this to give you some advice; these are some of the things I learned in life or things people have told me that helped me through different situations.

Even though I constantly had Brandy telling me this in high school, seriously don’t stress over the small things. I will admit at times I can get caught up in the small things and be temporarily upset but don’t let it get you down. A phrase I have been using recently is “if it won’t matter in a year don’t let it stress you out” or sometimes I say in a month. I know this phrase can be overused at times and even seem cliché but it’s so true and important to remember. I sometimes look back on high school experiences and wish I don’t get so upset about certain situations. With this being said, don’t let petty people or drama effect you for too long. It’s totally normal to be upset when people are mean to you but don’t let that dampen your day or week. Time in high school is so short, as you might know finishing your freshman year. Live it up! While high school might seem hard at moment, you’ll look back and realize that you should have enjoyed yourself more. Go after that fun job, get into your dream school, talk that attractive guy, befriend that person who you always wanted to talk to; don’t let anyone stop you from anything you want to do because I know if you put your mind to something you’ll accomplish it.

One major thing I realized after moving out of the south is that your weight or physical features aren’t the most important thing. If you feel you want to get more in shape or be more active let that be your decision. Don’t let anyone talk you into feeling uncomfortable about your physical appearance. I’ve learned from experience that people who make statements about your physical appearance are normally either jealous or insecure with themselves. Don’t let someone’s insecurities be your insecurities.

We’ve talked about college a lot together and I wanted to reiterate some important things. As you know I got into my first-choice college and I am extremely happy with it but it was a lot of stress for me when I was applying. I know Brandy and I always say this but try your hardest to do good throughout high school. Make sure to really think about the decisions you make because your future's so bright and I don’t want one bad decision to affect you negatively. College is such an amazing experience and I want you to have the opportunity for you to go to whatever school you choose to apply to. One thing you should know about the future is that it is perfectly normal to have no earthly clue what you want to do. You’ll figure it out, college is a time to figure out what you love and what you’re passionate about.

I wanted to end this with, I love you so much. I’m pretty sure you realize this but sometimes hard for me to express that to you. I know I give you a lot of tough love at times but it’s because I really want you to have the best in life. So, don’t get upset when my delivery come off harass at times; there’s love deep down I promise. Even though I get busy at times and can’t always call you, you know I’m always one text away.

Cover Image Credit: Caroline Domingue

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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To My Little Sister Who Became My Best Friend

You are so strong. Never forget that.

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It's no secret that most siblings go through periods of loving and hating each other before they become best friends. My parents always told us "don't burn bridges with your sister, one day she'll be your best friend," and like most moody teenagers, I would roll my eyes and walk away.

How could I ever become best friends with this person who stole my clothes, who would flirt with the boys I liked, who had more friends than I ever would?

To my surprise, I went off to college, and my sister became my best and closest friend.

To my not-so-little-sister (yes, we're only 13 months apart. Thanks, mom!) who finally became my best friend,

I know I haven't said it enough over the last 18-years, but I love you. Please remember no matter how many times that I'll continue to say it now, I will always love you so much. Having a sister like you has not only been one of life's biggest challenges but one of its biggest blessings as well.

Thank you for teaching me so many lessons in our journey through life together. I know that they typically say 'learn from your older siblings' mistakes,' but let's be real, you've taught me a lot more than I could have ever shown you.

Thank you for being there for me when life gets hard. For being the only familiar face in the halls of every new school, and holding my hand after each heartbreak, I experienced. Thank you for the many late-night Steak 'n Shake runs, and hours spent with me shopping at the mall (because we both know how indecisive I get when it comes to clothes). For the times we've danced in the kitchen screaming Demi Lovato's greatest hits avoiding the piles of dishes and laundry to do before mom gets home.

These are some of the memories I will cherish forever.

Thank you for being the best secret-keeper and the person I know I can always trust the most. You've seen me at my best, but also my worst and yet you never fail to be there when I need you. Sometimes I feel like you know me better than I know myself. Thank you for accepting who I am as a person and supporting me even when others in our family do not.

Despite all of the stupid fights growing up over stealing each other's shoes or clothes or what time we were going to leave for school in the morning (that was a weird one), I don't know what I would do without you. My biggest regret in life is looking back and realizing how much time we lost fighting over the littlest things. I miss having you close to me.

Know that I'm always here for you, even if it's a 2 A.M Facetime call away. You can come to me with anything and everything. I know I don't tell you this enough, but I am so proud of who you are and the woman you are becoming.

Through both the good times and the bad, I will always be here supporting you, encouraging you, and loving you. Through thick and thin I will always be your big sister (even if it's only by 13 months) who loves you. No amount of distance, no fight, and no mistake could ever change that.

A few things I hope you always remember my dear sister: you are beautiful, smart, determined, passionate, and talented. You are so strong. Never forget that. You are so much more than you will ever believe yourself to be. You can conquer the world and reach any of the dreams that you set yourself out to achieve. I know you will! You are capable of so much more than you will ever know. Work hard, never give up.

Through everything that you do, in everything that you face, I will always be here supporting you. I am so proud of you. I can't wait to see you reach all of your dreams.

"The bond between sisters is probably the most competitive relationship within the family, but once the sisters are grown, it becomes the strongest relationship." - Margret Mead

I love you forever,

Your big sister

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