To My 18 Year-Old Self,

If I could go back four years ago (whoa!) to when I was 18, and share all the things I've done and learned, I would. I would go back in time and change some things. People often say that it's not good to look back in the past and wish you could change it. I'm all for the saying, "Everything that's happened is either a blessing or lesson." However, if I had the chance, there are things that I could've been spared learning the hard way if I would've known better.

Stop caring so much about what people think of you.

It is terrifying when I look back and think of how impressionable I was at a young age. How I would not speak my mind and go with the flow because I was afraid of stepping on people's toes. People who didn't even matter in the moment, and certainly aren't even a part of my life now. I would get so intimidated by people who I thought were the "cool kids," when in reality they were just as insecure as I was, if not more. I learned through the long and painful process of finally realizing that the majority of opinions that I was so conscious of shouldn't have been the ones I was so keen on fulfilling.

Listen to the voice within you, not around you.

This is something that I still struggle with today, and it's something I wish I would've learned sooner. We live in a world where everyone is trying to tell us how to look, dress, act, even eat. How do we even know what we want when we are constantly trying to be pressured to be one kind of person? I was so heavily influenced by the media at a young age, and I would bash everything about myself because I could never live up to the expectation that society wanted me to be. It was just in these past couple of months that I realized how much society affects individual people without realizing the consequences it has on a person's self-esteem and view of the world. The truth of the matter is that society as a whole doesn't care about your waist size or what you do on the weekends; society is a blind cyclical cycle of always wanting more. So stop trying to impress everyone or changing yourself to fit the "norm." Listen to your heart, to your mind, to your soul about what you really want out of life. Don't let the opinions of others cloud what you are trying to get out of living.

Forget the boys who you know will break your heart.

I think this is the one that I really needed to hear when I was younger. I have a horrible track record with pursuing boys that would always end up leaving, and I knew it before it would even start. I always joke that my type is the "cocky douche bag," but in reality... what was I thinking?! My advice to my younger self and any other person: stop trying to think you'll be an exception to someone who doesn't respect other's feelings. You deserve so much better, you deserve to be with someone who will treat you with dignity.

But most importantly, love yourself.

This is the most important lesson I've learned within the past years, and this is something that I think is so important for anyone, especially in their late teens/early 20s. To love yourself for who you are in a world that is constantly trying to change you, there is something so powerful in that. I accepted less in my life because I didn't think I deserved anything more than what I was being given. But there came a time where I was tired of feeling inadequate, of tearing myself down. There is something so alluring and enticing about a person who is confident in what they believe in and what they do. That was something that I wanted; I wanted to be strong in every aspect of the word. And when you believe that you deserve more, if you tell yourself enough that you're worthy and that you're enough, you'll start to believe it. And when you begin to have confidence in yourself, nothing can stand in your way. It takes time, and a lot of persistence, and I'm not going to pretend like everyday it's the easiest thing to do, but it pays off in the end to love yourself. It truly does.

The struggle is part of the journey. In the past four years, I've changed a lot, and for the better. So maybe saying that I would go back and change things isn't the right wording. Maybe I wouldn't have believed this all at eighteen, but maybe others now can benefit from the lessons I've learned.

So if you're reading this, if you take anything away, let it be this: In a world that is cynical, bitter, and never satisfied, look within to find the love that we are all so desperately trying to find in others. Never settle for less, but know first that you deserve the world, and there is nothing wrong with truly believing that.