How My OCD Affects The Way I Watch TV

Having OCD for 5+ years has been a interesting ride, to say the least. I've overcome a lot, but the one thing I still struggle with is what I see in the the media. By media, I mean articles, movies, and TV series'.

I'm actually quite entertained by dramatic TV shows. I started watching this show called The Blacklist with my boyfriend; it's become our little tradition. But even this sweet tradition can still be tainted by my OCD. You see, the main character is married and gets cheated on. The show got very intense and my gears started turning. "What if my boyfriend was cheating?" "What if he isn't who he says he is?" My OCD took over and all I could think about were these things. I'd ask my boyfriend over and over if he was cheating on me he'd say no.

Luckily, he's patient and answers. However, I have to realize that my thoughts are often lies. These are things that may pop into other people's minds, but they are quickly able to dismiss them for the lies that they are. With OCD, those thoughts are never so easily dismissed and I have to remind myself repeatedly that my OCD's lies are not who my boyfriend is. I have to trust. That trust won't come immediately, but it is a daily fight.

Sometimes I have to take a break from the media for this very reason, and that's ok. I make that choice as I know I need to for the good of my mental health. I have to fight my battles like the great warrior God created me to be, and sometimes that means turning off the TV.