Motherhood is not defined by womanhood.
The ability to have children does not result in the possession of motherly qualities.
Every woman is not born to procreate.
In an era of powerful women in the workforce, the destruction of gender stereotypes and a welcoming attitude towards religious and sexual equality, the disregard for a young woman’s desire to make the choice to not have children continues to astound me. As I grow and discover my passions in life, they continue to veer far from any direction that would support having a family and settling down. I have no “baby fever”. I hear no ticking from a “biological clock”. I have no desire to birth or raise any children. I have never possessed a maternal instinct. I have never been drawn to take care of and nurture anyone or anything. I want to spend my life traveling the world and bouncing around jobs and homes and anything else life has to offer me. The prospect of a domestic lifestyle is not now, nor has it ever been, appealing to me.
In my own upbringing, I was surrounded by a mother who yearned for nothing more than to raise a family. My older sister frequently spent time with younger children and dreamed of the days that she would one day have her own kids. My younger sister kept an open mind about the possibility of having children one day, be they adopted or her own. None agreed on any particular decision that was right or wrong. There is a multitude of women who have a change of heart late in life. There are countless stories of families produced by those who later discover themselves more suited to settling down. There are those who have found an ability to raise their children in a fluctuating household so that their dreams of travel are not compromised. There are plenty of working mothers who maintain a loving and supported environment for their children.
There is no rule book that determines who should or should not have children. It is not outlandish for a woman to choose to live her life without ever becoming a mother.
We are all independent in our choices. We are all the creators of our own future. Do not disregard a woman's regard for children. It is not a decision reached overnight, it is not on a whim that multiple lives are accounted for. Motherhood is a calculated decision upon which lives are dependent. There is an immense difference between being a mother and being a woman. It is a decision to respect, not to judge and question.
