I could say that I’ve grown up in the church for practically my entire life. And that I attend church every Sunday. And that I co-lead a Bible study. And that I read my Bible and pray every day. And that I don’t swear. I don’t steal. I’m a pretty decent person, right? I help others when they’ve treated me like trash. I try to worship God through small acts throughout the day.
And boy do I suck.
I fight the pride inside me. The hate inside me. The impurity inside me And I fail. And am reminded I can’t do this on my own.
Because I am not my own.
I can’t be my own.
I’ve tried. And it’s a disaster.
Like a plane crashing into a train wreck disaster.
To the quote “You are enough”: No, I’m not. I know better than that. God’s shown me better than that. Because God is better. Better than what? He’s just better. That’s it. Jesus is all. I don’t need to be told that I’m enough. Even if we were to worship God a hundred billion times, we bring nothing, we have nothing within ourselves without Jesus. Jesus paid it all, and he brings it all.
He gave it all. Who are we to say we can bring something outside of Jesus? We need to bring to Christ ourselves, empty of our selfish desires and ready to be filled with Christ.
We need to bring our desires, our wills, to the feet of Jesus, surrendering our words of “Yeah, I know”—the phrase that stops us from growing.
The first sin in the Garden of Eden was rooted in wanting God's throne, not God. Are our desire and attention fixed on God? Or is it wandering somewhere else, not seeking God's counsel?
God wanted us from the beginning. He wants our hearts, our worship, our pouring out of ourselves so that we can be filled with Him, his desires, his all-knowing will.
Book knowledge, trivial Bible knowledge, Repetition, Religion, Man’s Rituals, are not how we maintain a Christian life. (Note I said 'trivial'. I am in no way saying good Biblical study and knowledge is unimportant.)
God wants a relationship, not your knowledge of the order of the books of the Old Testament. You don’t have to rely on your strength. Realize your lack of strength and turn it over to God.
In Him, our weakness is made strong.
Let God transfigure you to the person He has always known you to be.
“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me; your love, Lord, endures forever—do not abandon the works of your hands” Psalm 138:8
“In Him, our hearts rejoice for we trust in His holy name” Psalm 33:21
“I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith.
And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the Lord’s holy people, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God” Ephesians 3:16-19
“But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest on me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong” 2 Corinthians 12:9-10