Why I Think The Newest Horoscope Is BS

If you’re not a big believer in the star signs, you probably haven’t heard about the “new” addition to the horoscopes, Ophiuchus. And if you’re not as invested in your horoscope as I am, then you definitely don’t feel the outrage I feel as I sip coffee from my Scorpio mug, the Scorpio tattoo that I recently got finished just last year burning on my shoulder.

While I’m not a big believer in horoscopes, you know, the cheesy things that you can find every week on “Cosmo” or in any teen girl magazine, I do identify with most of the characteristics of my sign. I'm not sure whether that is because I have been raised to form myself around it or that’s just naturally what happens (which is kind of doubtful, as my best friend is a Scorpio as well, but shows almost none of the traits of one, as she identifies more as a Pig from the Chinese Zodiac), I can’t say, but it’s beyond infuriating to just suddenly add in a new sign that NASA has known about for YEARS.

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Seriously, this isn’t some new discovery or anything. People have known about it, but no one thought it was important. You know why? Because (in my own opinion) it’s stupid. You’re now suddenly shifting everyone into a new sign for the most part -- I would become a Libra, since my birthday is in early November, and I’ll put a chart at the end of this article so you all can see for yourselves what your new sign would be.

Now let me level with you here. I’m going to list out a few traits that “make” a Scorpio, and then I’m going to list a few that make a Libra. Ready?

Scoprio:

“Strengths: Resourceful, brave, passionate, stubborn, a true friend

Weaknesses: Distrusting, jealous, secretive, violent

Scorpio likes: Truth, facts, being right, longtime friends, teasing, a grand passion

Scorpio dislikes: Dishonesty, revealing secrets, passive people”

Libra:

“Strengths: Cooperative, diplomatic, gracious, fair-minded, social

Weaknesses: Indecisive, avoids confrontations, will carry a grudge, self-pity

Libra likes: Harmony, gentleness, sharing with others, the outdoors

Libra dislikes: Violence, injustice, loudmouths, conformity”

(Zodiac traits taken from http://www.astrology-zodiac-signs.com/zodiac-signs)

Now where are all my friends at who know that I am a horribly stubborn, horribly jealous, very secretive, “spunky” (because violent is way too strong of a word for me) girl? I do admit that, yeah, I share a lot of traits with a Libra. But my god, I am the biggest loud mouth when I want to be, and I have a little bit of Napoleon Syndrome. You can ask any of my guy friends; at one point or another I have tried to fight them. I seriously can’t help it. And again, I don’t follow the belief that this is a natural thing, and I do believe that in some ways, I have manifested who I am today around my sign. But still, if someone in the future asked me what my sign was, I would immediately say Scorpio. I would explain that I don’t play by the rules of the new zodiacs, because this is who I am as a person. It’s who I have always been, and always will be.

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Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I’m against change, or against new ideas. But my whole thing is that you’re just adding it in now why? If someone could give me a legitimate reason as to why Ophiuchus (which apparently means “Snake bearer”, which is the only thing that I’m currently liking about this sign) is being added now, I would understand. But honestly, I feel like this new sign isn’t going to sit well with everyone. Maybe in a few years, once everyone has stopped freaking out about it, I’ll hear someone on the streets say, “Oh I totally get that, I’m an Ophiuchus too!” And I won’t really react. I’ll just continue on my way.

But maybe I won’t. I can’t say. All I can say for right now is that I am not giving up my identity as a Scorpio. While I may not share all its given traits, I have always loved my sign, have always been interested in it and I have even been planning on getting a tattoo of Orion on my rib cage, for the irony of the story, and to demonstrate the many battles that I have overcome and still have yet to face, and those scars that I will always carry with me.

I’m not going to change who I am simply because the world thinks I should. And this is how I feel about everything. I won’t go into my beliefs, because this could easily head into a downward spiral, and I want to focus on my issue of the here and now: I’m a Scorpio. I always have been, I always will be, and if someone comes up to me in the future, and tries to say that I’m a Libra, and I should stop trying to identify with the ways of the Scorpio, we are going to have some very choice words coming from my mouth.

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NEW ZODIAC CHART: