I’ve become a very seasoned traveler these past few years. I’ve experienced everything from lost luggage to missed flights to having so many layovers, that I’ve tried to convince myself that I’ll never fly ever again. My recent time spent in airports has allowed me to participate in one of my favorite pastimes, people watching. I don’t know if it’s just me, but I see a lot of different people that are meant to be in a movie. That being said, here is a list of the people you might see when you’re traveling.
The Family
Families come in all different shapes and sizes, but I always run into the husband and wife with so many kids that they should probably just have their own plane. I mean hey, you have to give them their props for keeping everything together, but they have designer bags under their eyes that cost more than all of the college tuition they'll ever have to pay.
One kid is crying and you wish you could just start crying too, but that’s not encouraged when you’re 19 years old. There’s the two kids who are fighting over who gets the window seat (even though I’m pretty sure I still do that.) Then there’s the kid that’s like Veruca Salt from Willy Wonka that you just kind of want to slap to the side (also not encouraged) and finally, the kid who, knowing your luck sits behind you and kicks your seat the entire time.
The Loud Business Man
I don’t know about you, but this guy always hits pretty high on the annoying scale. He has to call everyone in his contact list twice and talk as loud as he possibly can. “YEAH BILL, I’M HEADED OUT TO OUR MAUII OFFICE. I’LL HAVE THE PAPERWORK ON YOUR DESK BY MONDAY. SAY HI TO LINDA AND THE KIDS FOR ME!” He just loves everyone staring at him. If you’re lucky, it might even be the guy who looks over to you and says, “sorry for being so loud on the phone,” and then proceeds to make three more phone calls.
The Lady Who is Still Single and Still Doesn’t Know How Security Works
Do you know that woman you saw struggling through security? You know, the one who wears every single piece of jewelry that she owns, with three carry-ons? My favorite is always the one who asks if she has to take off her high heels and if someone can watch her stuff so no one steals it. As you try to hide your eyes from rolling and your laughter, she starts to move forward, but oh wait, just kidding, she has to push everyone back because she forgot to take out her work laptop and her personal laptop out and put them in their own separate trays.
After she is at your gate with her “extra-skinny-no-fat-mocha-latte-frapiato with two cream, light sugar with extra foam and no fat,” she is eyeing the loud businessman up and down, waiting to catch a word in between his phone calls. Even though you are on the verge of vomiting in your mouth, you still secretly hope that they end up together and live happily ever after.
The Couple On the Plane
Speaking of happily ever afters, there’s always that couple who are madly in love and make you wish you had a travel buddy. Just as your thought bubble is beginning to form with a dreamy Zac Efron character, the bubble is popped by a guy who hasn’t bathed in three weeks who is starting to drool on your shoulder.
Happy traveling!
