Mental Illness, which is also sometimes called mental disorder, is defined as a wide range of conditions that affect mood, thinking, and behavior. These can range from dementia, ADHD, depression, anxiety, autism and PTSD, just to name a few. An estimated 26.2 percent of Americans ages 18 and older or about one in four adults suffer from a diagnosable mental disorder in a given year. I am part of this 26.2 percent.
With the given statistic above, even though mental disorders are widespread in the population, the main burden of illness is concentrated in a much smaller proportion of people (about 6 percent, or 1 in 17) who suffer from a serious mental illness. Approximately 20.9 million American adults, or about 9.5 percent of the U.S. population age 18 and older in a given year, have a mood disorder. I was diagnosed with a mood disorder on Oct. 28, 2015. I was also diagnosed with an anxiety disorder. Approximately 40 million American adults ages 18 and older, or about 18.1 percent of people in this age group in a given year, have an anxiety disorder. Most people with one anxiety disorder also have another anxiety disorder.
Specifically, in October 2015, I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder (MDD), also known as clinical depression. I was also diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder (GAD). Approximately 6.8 million American adults, or about 3.1 percent of people age 18 and over, have GAD in a given year.
I'm not sure what my initial trigger was but I've started to believe it's partly because of my struggle fully understanding my adoption. I think I started to experience symptoms my sophomore or junior year of high school, but it is hard to tell because I feel like this is something I have kept to myself my whole life. I've never been fully happy with myself. I've always been easily agitated, lashed out, push people away and kept to myself. However, I hate this side of me. Nearly three-quarters of those with an anxiety disorder will have their first episode by age 21.5. I was 19 when I had my first "I need to do something about this" episode. This was Oct. 20. The first step was admitting to myself that I wasn't OK. Eight days later, I was diagnosed and began my road to recovery.
This journey hasn't been easy at all. Beginning recovery isn't how it looks in movies. It's a lot of trial and error. My treatment consists of medication management and talk therapy. I began trying different medications to lift my spirits, help me sleep, regain focus, control my anxiety and frequent mood changes, and level out my mood. I've tried three different antidepressants but have only found two that work for me. I also started going to talk therapy every two weeks.
Today, on the five-month anniversary of my asking for help, after finding two medications that I have seen results with, and reducing talk therapy once a month, I am beginning to feel like the person I want to be. I still have moments where my old self presents itself, but this is a learning process. This is still my beginning of recovery.
