Like anyone would desire, you want your first love to be everything all at once. You want to experience a tremendous amount of joy, and you expect to feel like you're on top of the world with your significant other. I experienced all that and then some.
When you're 15, you don't really see yourself falling in love with someone, wether they are older or not. I was into school, sports, and friends. The last thing I ever wanted was to fall in love. I wanted to experiment, meet other boys, have fun in the puppy love stage. But, there are unexpected things in life that show up and change your life forever. That being my first love.
I'd like to thank him
I want to thank him for showing me a new meaning of happiness, and teaching me that it was ok to love someone. I thank him because at one point he was all I ever wanted. He was charming, always smiling, and making the best out of everything. Remember I had no experience with love like this before until now. My family loved him, they loved the idea of him and I. I must admit we did indeed have a great time but, remember, first loves don't always last.
My first love taught me what love was. Taught me how to feel so passionately about another human being. He taught me the way of life and how loved intertwined through it all. He taught me everything I thought I needed to know about love. The ins and outs, The ups and downs! He taught me how to be passionate, and how to care so gently for another. He showed me what love really was about, like the laughing, and crying, and the head-over heels for each other.
Heartbreak. A single word that can describe so much. I thank him for letting me experience what the word heartbreak actually means. The one thing no one wants in life is to be heart broken. Why? We don't want the tears falling every hour of the day, that makes us feel ugly. Heartbreak sometimes makes us never want to love someone again. Because the one we wanted, didn't want us anymore. Heartbreak is that lonely feeling where you think you aren't good enough for someone else to love you. I thank him for showing me what that felt like, it eventually made me stronger.
Love is not always perfect, you have to fight for certain things in order to be happy. Sometimes you just have to let go. Speaking of, I thank him for teaching me how to let go, for if I never learned I wouldn't be where I am today. I also would not have found the love of my life. I would have never been able to teach someone else what loving another is. I would never have learned that heartbreak is a good thing to experience sometimes.
First loves aren't always the last
Your first love isn't always all you want it to be. You want it to be your first, last, and everything inbetween. Instead, you lie in this puppy love stage where you imagine what you want your love to be like. You believe it, you dream it, but it almost never happens. Your first love sometimes is never your last love. Instead he or she opens the door for you, and you have to know wether or not to close it with them in it, or with them out of it. In my case I left without him in it.
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My first love was a learning experience, And I enjoyed the lessons taught along the way. Especially because I ended up finding the love of my life with lessons he had taught me. For that I am thankful. Remember if your first love doesn't last, sometimes it's for the better. :)