Throughout my senior year, I kept having these thoughts in my head where I think "Do I regret how I spent my last four years?", "Did I do enough?", "Should I have been more present?", "Did I need to stress out as much as I did?". I keep changing my answers every day and a new set of questions pop up in my head each time I think I start to come up with the right answers. The truth is, I'm not really sure how to answer these questions or if they can ever truly be answered. And that's okay.

I've realized in the past couple of weeks before graduation that growing up has a lot do with learning what you can and can't control. For example, you can't control that the post-graduation job position you applied for has already been filled, but you can control when and where you can apply next. You can't control how fast the days and weeks go by during your last year of school, but you can control what you do within each day and week. So as I keep finding myself having all of these thoughts about my experience in college, I realized that I can't control any of those questions or answers. The past is the past, and that can never change. No matter how hard I think or reason with myself, I can't control how the events of my life played out over the last four years. Whether they were good or bad, they already happened. I now have to accept that they have been a part of my life and embrace that they have made me who I am today: a successful college graduate.

So while I still have thoughts that drift in my head from time to time, I have begun to ask myself questions that I can control. Questions like "How will I use my experiences from the last four years to do good in the world?", or "How do I want to treat others after my college experience?", and "How do I plan on continuing to love myself after growing up and becoming an adult?". I will be honest and say I don't quite have a response just yet. But I sure am excited to find out the answers.