Last week Charlie had just learned that all of the information that Detective Campbell had given him was fake. Let's see what he does with this information! (1 & 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 & 7, 7)

SCENE VIII
Lights up on Detective Campbell’s office. CHARLIE is sitting there. CAMPBELL enters.

CAMPBELL
Hello Charlie! Sorry I’m late. The copy machine was out of paper.

CHARLIE
That’s right, you should be sorry!

CAMPBELL
Excuse me? Charlie, what’s gotten into you? Are you mad at me?

CHARLIE
Yes I am! And I have every right to be! Why did you do it Campbell?

CAMPBELL
Charlie, are you high?

CHARLIE
No I am not high!

CAMPBELL
Well then what the hell are you talking about?

CHARLIE pulls out a bible from his bag.

CHARLIE
Put your hand on this and swear on it. Promise to tell the truth, the whole truth,
and nothing but the truth.

CAMPBELL
Honestly Charlie, when is the last time you got some sleep? You look like crap.

CHARLIE
Put you hand on the bible and promise to tell the truth, the whole truth
and nothing but the truth!

CAMPBELL
Alright Charlie, calm down. I promise to tell the whole truth and nothing but the truth, all right?
Why are you so irate?

CHARLIE
I will be the one asking the questions if you do not mind! You lied to me
and gave me red shrimp!

CAMPBELL
I think you mean red herring.

CHARLIE pulls a gun from his bag and points it at her.

CHARLIE
Whatever! You pretended to be someone you aren’t and you killed my girlfriend!
Why did you kill my girlfriend? I was going to marry her, our life was going to be
perfect and you ruined it!

CAMPBELL
Oh. Well. Shit.

CHARLIE
Answer me now unless you want to get shot!

CAMPBELL
Shoot me and you’ll never get your answers. What do you want first, the reason why
I hate you? Or the one why I loathe your would-have-been mother in law? The answer
to the last one’s easy; she talks way too much about her cat.

CHARLIE
Well no shit. Keep going.

CAMPBELL
Isn’t there some kind of law in this state for handguns? If not there really should be; case in point.

CHARLIE
You have to the count of five to tell me your reasoning or you’re going to get it!

CAMPBELL
Alright, alright, alright! Calm down.

CHARLIE
Calm down? Really? You’re telling me to calm down when you’re the one who murdered
my girlfriend? No, I will not calm down! GIVE ME ANSWERS DAMN IT!

CAMPBELL
Well you just answered the first question. Me. Me. Me. That’s all you ever think
about is yourself!

CHARLIE
That is not true! I think about Andria all the time! I miss her like crazy!

CAMPBELL
Oh sure, sure you do. NOW THAT SHE IS DEAD! GOOD GOD MAN!

CHARLIE
IF I DIDN’T CARE ABOUT HER THEN WHY WOULD I HAVE ASKED HER TO MARRY ME?

CAMPBELL
Excellent question, Charlie. Why don’t you take a moment to think about that, after all
you had been dating for ten years. IT TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH! I mean seriously,
what were you waiting for?

CHARLIE
What’s it to you that I waited 10 years? And how did you even know that?

CAMPBELL
I’m a detective, Charlie. It’s what I do.

CHARLIE
Why don’t we get back to the matter at hand? Tell me why you killed my girlfriend!

CAMPBELL
You know Charlie, she has a name! How about you use it instead of being so
possessive all the time?

CHARLIE
That is so beside the point, tell me why you killed Andria!

Off stage we hear MRS. JONES

MRS. JONES
CHARLES? OH CHARLES! ARE YOU IN HERE?

MRS. JONES enters.

MRS. JONES (cont.)
Oh good gracious! Charles, put that gun away!

CHARLIE
Mrs. Jones, what the hell are you doing here?

MRS.JONES

Well you weren’t returning my phone calls and I needed to talk to you so I decided that
I would just check all the places you might be and-

CHARLIE
You really are a mad woman aren’t you?

MRS. JONES
Tell me something I don’t know. Now Charles, put that gun away.

CHARLIE
And I should do that why?

MRS.JONES
Because that happens to be my daughter you’re pointing it at!