To the average person, in the eighth month of our calendar year, August, it's nothing special. Small details vary throughout the month. Such as, when you go outside for a walk, the August air may feel no where near as hot as it was in July. If you're from Europe then August is when you have your most vacation days. If you spend a descent amount of time viewing the night sky then you may see more meteor showers than normal, but other than these few, very small, special characteristics, August is a pretty unexceptional month, (my apologies if you have an August Birthday, HBD to you!)
But for me, when I flip to August in my calendar, I am overcome with a handful of contradictory emotions.
Rememberence, Faith, Hope, Fear, Sadness, and Guilt, are just a few (or maybe too many).
When I think of August, I think of National Stevens Johnson Syndrome Awareness Month.
I Remember my own battle with this terrible illness. At just a few years old, I was diagnosed with Stevens Johnson Syndrome. MayoClinc.org describes Stevens Johnson syndrome as "A rare, serious disorder of your skin and mucous membranes. It's usually a reaction to a medication or an infection." During the illness, cell death causes the epidermis to separate from the dermis.
Without the Faith of my parents and close family and friends, I don't think I could have recovered from this disease and be as healthy as I am today. It was their faith in God and His plan for me that I am still here today.
Everyday I Hope that people and their families do not have to go through this terrible illness that results in damage to internal organs, eye problems, permanent skin damage, and blood and skin infections.
I still Fear for my own health every now and then. The cause behind my specific case was never fully detected, therefore I avoid a number of drugs that my doctors believed could be linked to my case.
It is hard to see people all over the internet with cases much more severe than mine and not feel Guilty about how healthy I am now. There have been many times that I have questioned the path of my own life. Why them and not me? Why do they have to live a life with life altering complications such as being blind, while I can see perfectly fine. Why do scars cover their entire body, when my skin grew back healthy?
If I completely questioned why my fate ended up resulting in the way it did then I would drive myself insane. We can't question God's choices or His plan for us, we just need to learn from the opportunities that he has placed right in front of our very own eyes. It took me a while to understand this. I believe that God saved me because he wanted me to share my experiences and help spread awareness about this terrible disease. I have been able to share my story through writing. While, it is tough to get vulnerable and open up to strangers through words, it has made me a stronger person by letting me share my experience. It was something that I kept secret from my close friends for a long time and it feels liberating to talk about it.
This is why August is important to me and not just another 31 calendar-days that fly by before you know it. It is a month of awareness, of remembrance for those who have fought for their health and their lives. Throughout August I find myself wearing blue more often (Stevens Johnson Awareness Color). August is a month that gives me another proud opportunity to share my story.
"Awareness is like the sun, when it shines on things they are transformed"
- Thich Nhat Hanh
To learn more about Stevens Johnson Syndrome you can visit http://sjsupport.org. The Stevens Johnson Syndrome Foundation is a non-profit organization founded in 1996. They offer emotional support for victims and help spread awareness to the public. Always educate before you medicate.
