10 Things I Learned When My Mom Took Over My Tinder
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10 Things I Learned When My Mom Took Over My Tinder

Yes, my mother took over my tinder for the night (with supervision).

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10 Things I Learned When My Mom Took Over My Tinder
Madison Burton

While home over winter break, my mom asked me what dating is like for girls my age. So, being the brutally honest 18-year-old that I am, I decided to open her eyes to the world of Tinder. My mom married young and did not fully dive into the world of dating in her youth, not to mention online dating. Needless to say, she was intrigued and had many questions.

Is Tinder the best place to find Mr. Right? Definitely not; however, the app offers you endless Mr. Right Nows. I think that nicely parallels a college girl's romantic outlook.

Before swiping, I had to get my mother acclimated to the true essence of Tinder, and what better way to do that then to show her the craziest messages I have received from guys? She was horrified and slightly amused (but mostly horrified) at the "audacity" of these boys in their odd requests and pick-up lines. It was especially fascinating to watch someone who hasn't been desensitized by internet and meme culture read some of the more R-rated messages. 10/10 would recommend for perspective reasons.

Since I try not to take my Tinder too seriously, I let her sit in the captain's chair of swiping, and I'm not mad about it. Here's what I learned. Boys, listen up.

Looks aren't everything

I know, I know. This is one is a tale as old as time but never fails to ring true. On Tinder, looks are almost everything when swiping. Right off the bat, you're presented with pictures of bachelor(ette)s, and reading their bios requires you to expand the profile. Looks are really all you have to initially base your swipes on, but my mom took her time looking at their careers, education, bios, and even Spotify choices... you go, Mom.

Girls in his photos = BIG red flag

Mom raised a good point. If it's not CLEARLY his sister, who is it? His ex-girlfriend? Or even worse, his current girlfriend? His crush? His wife?! You really never know. Guys, crop her out or prepare for the swipe left.

Quality > Quantity

Again, we've all heard this one, but according to Mama, it's gospel! She was so picky! Was it because she was choosing for her only daughter? Maybe. Whatever the reason, very few guys deemed worthy of the right swipe. Do your research, ladies. It's a wild world out there.

For me, super likes are a no-no (if you aren't familiar with the super like, it is a way to show someone you like them before you match. You can do it once per day), but Mom super liked a handsome 24 year old because he passed enough of her standards. I haven't matched with him yet... yikes.

Pictures with Mom? Hubby Material

If he's not ashamed to be post a pic with his mama, he has a good heart. He. Respects. Women.

First impressions are everything... take better selfies

What am I looking at? Are those your nostrils? I don't even want to guess what body part that's supposed to be. Ew.

Seriously, these guys need to take a decent, head-on shot. I agree with Mom on this one. I don't want to see your favorite cartoon character or you shotgunning a Natty Lite (bringing me to my next point).

Drunk photos are NOT cute

There's a reason you delete and untag yourself from party pictures. The beer-stained tee just isn't tasteful. You may be a party animal, but PLEASE, leave a little mystery.

No group photos for 1st picture. EVER

"Don't make me fall in love with your cute friend only to find 4 pictures in that it's really you, and I'm not interested," - Mom

Honestly, she's not wrong:

1. It's confusing

2. Don't make us wish you were your friend

Bios are important! 

Mother knows best: No acronyms ("DTF"... I'm talking about you) and don't just put your height. This is the only hint of your personality we can really get from your profile. Use it wisely and tell us about you!

Don't TELL me to swipe right, SELL me to swipe right

My mom raised a valuable point, guys taking the "swipe right, you won't" approach have zero game. Instead of intimidation, make us WANT to swipe right. What makes you so special?

For the love of God, use the correct *you're

Tinder is 18+, so I know that all of you passed elementary school. Do us a favor and pay attention to your grammar. It makes a difference ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

I'd like to think I already knew most of these points, but my mom's validation definitely helped refine my swiping technique. My standards are raised, my swiping is more left-heavy, and I am thriving.

Comment if you want more Tinder related articles or for my mom to edit my profile for a part two!

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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