Let me just start off by stating the absolute obvious, I miss you. I miss everything about you. I miss the everyday calls asking how I am, the loving kisses and hugs, the fantastic dinners you would make for the family and so fourth. I miss your unfathomable amount of love and care that you had for each and every single person you came in contact with throughout your life. And, most importantly, I miss the warrior that was and still is my inspiring grandmother.
I go to call you a lot quite frankly, but then I realize that there just won't be an answer to the phone anymore. It saddens me to know that we cannot as of now hear one another's voices, but I know that deep down you are sending me signals and signs all the time to let me know that you are doing well, and that you are happy and okay.
And, even though this hurts a great amount, I'd love to reminisce for a moment in time. With a heavy heart, I really miss our phone calls more than anything in the world, especially right about now. You asking about my day, me asking you back, and the venting sessions we would have with one another. Whether I was having my daily boy troubles or overwhelmed with school work, there you would be on the other end of the phone calming me down second by second and letting me know that if I stay calm and fight through the hardship just like you did your entire life, everything will go as planned.
I receive the signals you send especially when I am going through a rough patch in my life. Things can just be so hard sometimes, but you let me know that you are there by my side. Eventually, when I push through and overcome my insanely challenging obstacles, it's because there you are at the end of the tunnel. You are the light shining up from way above me. I couldn't be more blessed to have that in my life each and every single day.
Quite frankly though, I am also very grateful for the amazing moments we had spent together. Although I am 20 years old now, thank you for physically being here for an amazing 19 years of my life. You were there for my graduations, my birthdays, my parties, almost each and every single holiday and many more smaller occasions. We would celebrate the amazing moments in life together, and mourn in times of sadness side by side. The comfort of your arm around me made me feel safe and loved.
Grandma, not a day goes by that I don't think about you and all that you suffered through. You were born with so many different health issues, but that never stopped you and I mean ever. As the amazing human being that you were (and still are in spirit), you put everyone before yourself. Here's to you, the most selfless human being that I truly have ever met.
I would go on to list more things and personal moments to share, but then my list would just keep going on and on forever with no end within the foreseeable future. So, all I have to say is really this letter was so important for me to write, and for everyone who is reading it to hear. I want them to know how special it is to have someone in your life, and how important it is to stay in contact with them as much as possible. Your loved ones are people who should be valued as they are there for you through thick and thin.
I love you with all my heart. Rest easy up there, and I cannot wait to be reunited with you one day. And, lastly, as I have stated before, my love for you is infinite.
Xoxo,
Ally.
