When I think about (and long for) my hometown, it’s not for specific people or places or things. I find myself yearning for moments--whether frequent moments that I came to take for granted or one-time moments that took my breath away.

I miss drives to school with my sister--scrambling to get into the car with our oversized backpacks and english muffins with peanut butter. I miss her easy chatter and my scratchy radio and the obnoxious early morning radio shows that we were never able to avoid. Somehow, I even miss her screaming at me to hurry up and sprinting from the car to get to class on time.

I miss early mornings at the barn--beginning with that dreaded alarm at 4:00 AM and ending with quiet rides home in the truck, sandwiched between multicolored ribbons and jack russell terriers. I miss the smell of horses and the way stroking my horse’s soft coat used to calm my nerves. I miss memorizing courses and horse show grilled cheeses and getting the perfect distance between jumps.

I miss late night car conversations with my best friend in the middle of winter, turning the car on and off so we didn’t freeze. I miss her cheesy throwback playlist and being able to talk about anything and everything. I miss being so close: discussing politics and making campaign calls for Bernie Sanders and planning out the rest of our lives together.

I miss early afternoon yoga--when the light in the studio was soft and playful just like the instructor’s voice. I miss stretching my body a little too much and feeling it the next day. I miss the places my mind would go during Shavasana and the way the practice pulled the anxiety from my body like iron filings to a magnet.

I miss lazy summer evenings--my mom elbow deep in her garden, my dad stationed in a lawn chair by the grill, listening to Selena Gomez. I miss my mom’s nagging and my dad’s sarcastic jokes and the sound of my dogs barking at the innocent victims who walk by. I miss playing stupid games with my sister and accidentally throwing the basketball into the back yard and flying down our hill on scooters (and always falling off).

I miss horror movies with too much popcorn. I miss midnight trips to Compo Beach and the Monroe Diner. I miss last minute concerts. I miss muddy bike rides and watermelon eating contests. I miss

writing at Starbucks (and Starbucks pics) and the freeing feeling of leaving school at 2:07. I miss years of soccer games and practices and watching reruns of Shark Tank in my basement. I miss it all.