Society’s perfect idea of how to go about living life is to graduate high school, go to college, get your degree, start your career, get your own place, date for 2-3 years, get married and have kids. Many of us were raised to live our lives this way, always have a career before a family. It makes complete sense, having the means to support yourself before also having to support others. But what if people did things backwards and got married young?
I was a junior in high school when I met the man I was going to marry without even knowing it. He didn’t live where I lived at the time and our parents happened to be lifelong friends. (It's pretty awesome to not have to worry about in-laws not liking each other). Over the next couple years we lost communication, both of us absorbed in our senior years and determining what we were going to do with our lives. We only reconnected due to a simple "How are you doing" text. Needless to say, we talked for the next year and half, eventually falling in love with each other's personalities. I had a lot of friends at the time who thought I was crazy for loving someone I hadn't seen in three years. To fast forward and put into perspective how serious we were about each other: he surprise-visited me in October of '14. Shortly after, we got married on December 29, 2014. He was 20, I was 19.
My family took a lot of heat because I got married so young. People, even friends, would ask my parents "How could you let her do this?!" Or "I can't believe you're condoning this kind of behavior, I would never let my daughter/son get married at this age." Getting married before 21 is against everyone's "norms." If the couple is happy, then why not be happy for them? There are young couples that get married right out of high school or in college who are doing perfectly well! Traveling, starting families, and growing up together. I can count five couples that I know in my life. It is truly amazing. Just to put the cherry on top, people who marry at younger ages tend to stay together without even having divorce as a factor. (Proven fact!)
That is my opinion anyway. Another way to view the topic is to analyze pros and cons of getting married young.
PROS | CONS |
You marry your best friend. | You cannot regret your decision; be 100% sure! |
You get to live every day together. It's such an adventure! | You have to realize that you will not be a part of the same lifestyle as your college friends. (Personally, cuddling up on a couch and watching a movie is so much better than getting drunk!) |
Your spouse is there to grow with you and support you no matter how hard things get. | IF you decide to get married, be prepared for the unexpected, life changing events. (Pregnancy and having to move are good examples) |
Your family grows! Now you have his side of the family to appreciate as well! | Hopefully you like your future in-laws... |
In all seriousness though, it is not easy. My first year of marriage had its rough patches. You have to be okay with appreciating and loving each other more than material possessions. We went broke MANY times but love and support got us through it. Getting married in general is a huge adjustment, it's not a decision that should be made on a whim. It takes commitment and patience, determination and faith. I know I made the right decision for myself because ten year from now when I look back at what my husband and I have built together, it will be worth it. Regardless of whether you are young or old, love with all your heart and marry your best friend. Even if you don’t want to get married, your happiness and the joy of living your life the way you want, rather than listening to everyone else's ideas is what truly matters.
(This article was written from experience and opinion alone, no outside resources used.)
