On August 14, the New York Times released an article revealing that Donald Trump’s campaign chairman, Paul Manafort, was designated $12.7 million total in cash payments in an illegal “off-the-books” system by the political party of former Ukrainian president, Viktor Yanukovych. Manafort was a political consultant and lobbyist for Yanukovych, a man who spent majority of his political career pining for a few more hours of pillow talk with Russian President Vladimir Putin, as well as a half a decade of his youth in prison for robbery and assault, likely unrelated to charming the Russian politician since Vladimir was only four at the time. Nevertheless, Mr. Yanukovych allegedly got closer to Mr. Putin in exile – only geographically speaking, that is – as the Russian president was shifting his attention to winning the heart of Crimea by thrusting his troops into the peninsula without consent, making many wonder if he spent too much of 2013 binge-watching Law & Order: SVU.
Manafort spent a decade working for the Pro-Russian Party of Regions. Although there is no proof that Manafort accepted the illegal payments, the resurfacing of his professional relationship with politicians sympathetic to the Kremlin has even certain leaders of RNC raising questions for Trump about his relationship with Russia. Questions such as – Is Trump’s refusal to release his tax returns indicative of ties with Russian oligarchs? Was he serious when he called on the foreign power to hack into his opponent’s email server? And, in his opinion, which Eastern European village has the hottest trophy wives?
This comes only weeks after the Trump campaign worked to “gut” the wording of the Republican platform that called for shipping weapons to Ukraine for the purpose of fighting Russian and rebel forces. Yet, Trump continues to deny that he is sympathetic to Russia, despite his friendly relationship with Putin and business ties to the country since the late 1980s. Similar to your Aunt from Mississippi who swears she isn’t racist but spends her Friday nights playing Bunco with the brides of the White Knights.
Given Manafort’s history of facilitating the elections of two politicians who were deposed in popular uprisings, including former Filipino dictator Ferdinand Marcos, some wonder if the Trump campaign chairman’s resume is indicative of what may come if Donny is elected president. However, in spite of the questionable morals of Manafort’s clients, avid Trump supporters are directing the blame and their average-sized fingers at the left. Even Corey Lewandowski (Trump’s ex-campaign manager that was fired from the staff in a tiff of bad blood) defended Manafort, saying that the New York Times piece was just “another” example of liberal bias against Trump in the media. Kind of like how Janice in accounting still attests to the pure heart of her ex-boyfriend long after he was convicted of murdering his parents with his fiancé, Martha. In an interview on CNN’s “New Day”, Lewandowski explained: “Number one, Paul says there was no money received. Number two, there’s no proof of any money received. Number three, Cheryl Mills was a government employee at the time.” Cheryl Mills was chief of staff for the Department of State who allegedly volunteered for the Clinton Foundation during her tenure in what some may call a conflict of interest. Although to be fair, her work was unpaid – therefore permitted by the State Department – and the reference the ex-campaign manager is making here is to one day in 2012 that Mills took a trip from DC to New York to interview candidates for the Foundation. Thus, in this interview, Mr. Lewandowski auditioned for a new gig as the Count on Sesame Street and attempted to rationalize the Manafort accusations by comparing Trump’s campaign chairman – who helped elect a dictator that incited violence against masses of his civilians – to a government employee – who interviewed a Wal-Mart executive for a charity on a hot, summer afternoon in New York City. In a recent study conducted by a homeless man on the subway, 9/10 sweat-drenched New Yorkers agree that Ms. Mills has suffered punishment enough.
Last Wednesday, the news broke about a “shake-up” in the Republican nominee’s campaign leadership. The announcement of new hires, including Stephen Bannon as the campaign’s chief executive and Kellyanne Conway as campaign manager, was seen by some as a demotion for Manafort, despite the retention of his title as campaign chairman. Others, however, believed it was an effort by the Trump kids to have a few more adult voices telling dad to take a breather on the taco tweets captioned “I love Hispanics” and to reserve his suggestions of an NRA “Kill Hill” mission for the dinner table. Also to add to this list of well-respected conservative advisors joining Team Trump’s pre-season workouts, Roger Ailes is rumored coaching the debate squad and ensuring that Kellyanne and Ivanka have burned all their pantsuits by Labor Day.
By Friday, more news was released about how Manafort helped route $2.2 million to Washington lobbying firms from the pro-Russian Ukrainian government in 2012 and continued to advise the Party of Regions through last year, making it clear that he was no Simone Biles and had little likelihood of sticking the landing from his great fall from the theoretical wall on the Mexican border. Thus, on August 19, the campaign made it official, accepting “selfless act” of the chairman’s resignation; although, some may infer from Ms. Conway’s comments that Mr. Manafort may have indeed heard “you’re fired” on the fifth floor of the Trump Tower.
On the bright side, at least he wasn't the first.
