Loving yourself is hard. It takes time for you to be able to look past all of your "flaws" and still see the amazing person you are. We're all different and we all see ourselves differently as well. The way you see yourself isn't always how the rest of the world sees you. Because of this, it's a daily struggle trying to maintain your confidence in an ever changing world. You don't just wake up one morning and suddenly think "Wow, I'm great. I love me". It's a process and, like I said, it takes time. There are three important aspects of loving yourself: learning to love your own company, learning to love your flaws, and learning to love who you are. Once you've accomplished all of these, loving yourself gets easier.
Learning to love your own company:
As you grow up, you begin to do more and more for yourself. You take yourself to the doctor, go grocery shopping alone, and do all of the things that you're supposed to be able to do by yourself. You do these things because you have to, not because you want to. It's important to be able to do things you enjoy on your own sometimes. Of course, we all have more fun spending time with family or friends, but spending time getting to know yourself can be just as interesting. Take yourself out for lunch or go read a book in the park. Do something you enjoy and do it by yourself so you can get to know YOU. Once you've learned to love your own company, you can't be stopped.
Learning to love your flaws:
Everybody has things they wish they could change about themselves. Everybody has days where their flaws prevent their confidence from prevailing. It's okay to dislike things about yourself, but don't let your flaws define who you are. You have to stop comparing yourself to other people. You've got to stop looking at over-edited magazine photos and wondering why you don't look like the people you see. Even models have things they're insecure about because they're people, too. The scars on your skin show you're a survivor. The stretch marks on your body are unique, just like you, and they are meant to remind you of how much you've grown. Thigh gap or not, who cares? Your body is your body and you have to learn how to appreciate what you have. You are unique and so is your body. So when you're struggling to love the way you look, just remember everyone else feels the way you do sometimes. I know it can be hard to remember that you're not alone, especially on those days when none of your clothes seem to fit right, but please never forget that your flaws do not define who you are. They are unique, you are you unique, and that's the way it should be.
Learning to love who you are:
Physical appearance is just one aspect of what makes you who you are. Growing up I'm sure you heard the phrase "it's what's on the inside that counts". Cliché, I know, but it's true. Your looks change as you grow older, but your personality is a constant. The way you see yourself is only an aspect of learning to love yourself. Loving your personality is the easiest way to allow your confidence to shine. Love your sense of humor, your laugh, your ability to care for other people, and everything that makes you who you are. Your personality is the foundation of every relationship people build with you. Make them fall in love with who you are, not just what you look like and you'll be able to feel the same way about yourself.
And, finally...
Learning to love yourself:
Like I said, loving yourself is a process. Every day when you wake up, it's a new chance to try and love yourself. Bad days happen to everyone, but you can't allow them to knock you down completely. Keeping yourself on a pedestal all the time isn't healthy, either. It's important to find the balance in between being obsessed with yourself and hating yourself... which is... drumroll please... loving yourself.
So love your flaws. Love your skin color. Love your thighs, your smile, your obnoxiously loud laugh, your big ears, your tiny nose, your poofy hair, and every little part of what makes you, you.
You are beautiful, inside and out. Once you realize that your entire outlook on life changes. Take it from me, loving yourself opens so many doors.
