Little,

You are my greatest achievement when it comes to the art of stalking. From the moment we started hanging out, I knew we would be friends for life. Finding you has been one of my biggest blessings. As it’s getting closer to recruitment, I’m becoming aware that soon you are going to have a little blessing of your own. In theory I couldn’t be more excited to see our family grow…

I love that you will get to experience that same excitement that I did when I was trying to "recruit" you into our fam. Nothing was more exciting than asking you to get lunch, study, or come over before going out. Don't get me wrong, I love when we do those things together now, but it's not the same, anxious feeling - I've already won you over.

But I hate the time that your "recruiting" will take away from my time with you. Looking back, I spent A LOT of time with you before you became my little. I may not have balanced my time with my own big as much as I should have. Of course, I know that this time is special for you, so I will be a proud mama as I watch you fall in love with your future person. I just hope that you will create a better balance than I did.

I love the stress and anxiety that getting your little will cause you. This is mainly for my enjoyment because I've already been there, I know what it's like. You'll spend hours trying to figure out if she wants you too (which of course she does...how could she not?). It'll make you go crazy though. Your best friends will have to reassure you constantly. I will do damage control for you, just like my big did for me. I will scope out the competition for you, just like my big did for me.

Mainly I love that I don't have anything to stress about this year. My pledge class spent hours matching people up, and at times it tore us apart. Not in a catty, dramatic, "I hate you" way. But in a "omg they like her too... no no no I want her!!!" kind of way. It was stressful, but it was fun. And now I get to sit back and watch, just as every grandma should do.

But I do hate not being in control. Yes, I am happy that this is your time to shine...but you know how much I hate to feel left out! Now it's your time to buy presents for your little. It's your time to write cute notes and receive sweet letters in return. And I'm jealous. Making crafts for you and buying you cute things was so much fun! Everything I did for you was another memory for us. It was something to connect us. And now you get to share that with someone else.

I'll admit, although it has taken me some time to get to this point... I have decided that I am happy that you are getting a little - despite my occasional selfish thoughts.

Why? Because most importantly, I love the person you will gain when you receive your little. Because honestly, you will receive so much more than just the title 'Big' when you get her. As much as I don't want to miss out on the fun, it makes my heart so happy to know what is coming for you.

Not only are you my little, but you are one of my bestest friends. At times I even feel like we are dating, while other times we act like actual sisters. Sometimes I feel like you know me better than I know myself. And if there was one thing I knew for sure, it would be that you will always be there for me -- to laugh at me, to cry with me, and to forever be by my side -- for the rest of my life.

And if someone else can give you all that you give me, how could I not love that? Well, I'd have to not love you.

Love you forever,

Your Big

P.S. I miss you...come hang out with me.