When I first read this question I immediately decided to keep my memories. I couldn’t bear to part with my childhood of saving mice from my cat or running around barefoot in the grass with my little sister and chasing my little brother around the park. The idea that I would lose the warm fuzzy feeling of recognition that I get every time I see a friend haunted me. My mind would no longer light up with all the wonderful memories we share when I see them smile. I would no longer recognize my nana’s perfume if I smelled it in the street, I wouldn’t be able to turn and smile if I heard my mom or dad laugh behind me. All of those associations and thoughts and feelings would be gone. All of the things that make me who I am, that make up the very foundation that I stand upon as a human being, would be gone forever. My life would effectively be gone; all that would be left behind is a recognizable shell and the shreds of my personality brought about by nature. I would be a completely blank slate, tabula rasa.
With all that said, I can’t help but think it would be worse the other way. While I would lose so much of who I am and so many irreplaceable moments that I dearly treasure, those moments and relationships could be rebuilt. If I were to wake up tomorrow with no memories, just as I am, who would be at my bedside? Who would reach out to me and explain the memories I had lost, tell me the stories I was a part of? I’d like to think that the important people, the necessary and vital friends and family who made my life what it was, would be there. I would be told all of the good things, and all of the important bad things and I would keep all of the people who wanted to be kept and lose all those who didn’t. The relationships I had lost would be rebuilt by new memories and connections we’d build from scratch.
Logically, losing my memories makes more sense. If I were unable to make new ones, I would be forever stuck in time. My life would end on the spot and all of the wonderful people I would have met or would have connected to would no longer matter to me. I would effectively lose all of the memories I was going to make and all of the future connections I was destined to build. Keeping my memories would prevent me from growing and prevent me from living my life. My past would become my present and my future-leaving me with nowhere to go.
While it’s interesting to ponder what life would be the fact that I don’t have to choose is a blessing. I’m eternally thankful to have made the memories and connections that I have made in my lifetime and look forward to all of the ones I will eventually make.
That’s it from me, sorry for rambling. Love you guys.
