Why Hiding Your Emotions Does More Harm Than Good
Start writing a post

Some people are so good at downplaying their sadness that even they don't realize how much they do it. When you ask them how they are they will always say that they are good, even when they aren't. They exhaust themselves by plastering an energetic and carefree persona in the spaces that you watch them in because at least to you they can control how they appear. They can pretend to be the happy person they want to be when everyone is telling them how funny and bubbly they are all the time.

They can pretend to be happy when everyone is watching.

The pressure is always on their shoulders to keep this act up because they never want everyone to worry. They are the ones always checking up on others and people-pleasing because it helps them get through the day. They never want you to feel as alone as they do and when you smile at them, relieved, it soothes their aching soul. They stretch themselves thin making others happy. Since they can't help themselves, at least they can feel some secondhand happiness when they lift up everyone else's spirit. They are everyone's confidant, savior, and best friend. They want to see you thrive.

They are the most reliable people you know, but they pour from an empty cup. They are so tired.

Once they are alone they sit with the fact that they feel dead inside. Sometimes they don't ever allow themselves to be alone for this very reason. They surround themselves with people who will drown out the voices in their own heads. They are the ones who overwork themselves and find no joy in relaxation. The sadness can't get to them when they have no time to be sad, they make sure that they run from themselves with a busy calendar, a heavy workload, or a bursting social life. Sometimes they numb themselves by endlessly scrolling on their phones. They think they can run from the darkness inside themselves but they can't. It creeps up on them late at night, or in crying spells early in the morning. Sometimes it hits them when they are surrounded by people and suddenly...they feel indescribably alone.

They feel alone because they haven't made friends with themselves yet.

If you see someone with the biggest heart you've ever known and the most unbreakable smile you have seen, look into their eyes.

Maybe the person who is always happy is not so happy after all. Maybe they are dying for someone to see past their artificial smile and tell them that the gig is up. Maybe they need you to let them fall apart and tell them it's okay to feel other emotions because they have lived their whole life telling themselves that they can't — that they won't be a burden just because they aren't always at their best and making everyone else smile and laugh, that they are strong enough to face their demons instead of letting their demons haunt them.

It took me years to stop running from my emotions.

The moments where people described me as the life of the party, I realize now were my moments of deepest grief. I was overcompensating. I still hide my pain, but not all of it. I tell people close to me how I feel. I let myself feel everything I need to feel, and I remind myself that it's okay to do so. I am more honest and real about my emotions now. The quality of my relationships has improved. They are deep and fulfilling relationships I didn't know I was missing out on by never letting anyone in.

My smile is more unbreakable than ever, now that I've finally let myself cry.

Report this Content

That's right, you heard that correctly: Demi Lovato and Max Ehrich called off their engagement after the couple originally announced their engagement in July after beginning to date in March.

Keep Reading... Show less

Demi Lovato's Called-Off Engagement Reminds Us Of The Importance Of Taking Our Time In Relationships

While this may be another hardship she sadly has to endure, I know she will find a way to inspire and help others through it.


I am heartbroken.

Keep Reading... Show less

Freshly popped buttered popcorn in your lap and a glass full of crisp Coca-Cola is at your side. All the lights are turned off and you are tucked into a cozy blanket. You have the whole day off and no responsibilities besides refilling your popcorn bucket. Now all you have to do is decide on what movie to watch, but you know one movie will not fulfill your need of relaxing all day. A movie marathon is the only answer to your problem. In case you did not know what movie series to start with, try a few of these.

Keep Reading... Show less
A Touch Of Teal

It's the oldest story in the world: one day a new tv show comes on and you fall in love with each character and their story. In 2003, the show "One Tree Hill" was born and stole the hearts of fans of many ages. Torn between the sweet, underdog Lucas and tough, popular boy Nathan, people became hooked through the family and relationship drama the characters went through.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

12 Starbucks Iced Drinks You NEED In Your Life

Must-try beverages brought to you by your local barista.


Be kind to your baristas, they can make you some pretty great drinks. With the temperature rising and the days getting longer, it's approaching the time to find your summer staple to keep you cool (and caffeinated) over the next few months.

Keep Reading... Show less

"Keeping Up With The Kardashians" is coming to an end after 20 seasons of intense drama, family bonding, and Scott Disick. It's sad for some and a relief for others who find the show way overhyped.

Keep Reading... Show less

Starbucks is known for its infamous coffee and espresso drinks, but they're definitely isn't enough love shown for the non-coffee drinks. Being a barista myself, I've come to try all of the following drinks. And let me tell you…they're amazing. So if you aren't a huge fan of coffee or if you're just sick of the same old same old, here are some new drinks to keep your inner white girl alive and thriving.

SEE MORE: Starbucks Has Chocolate-Covered Strawberry Cold Brew And OMG It Has Pink Foam

Keep Reading... Show less

What was usually buried at the bottom of my purse has now become a pocket essential — and I know I'm not alone in that.

It used to be something I'd use if I happened to be at a restaurant that ran out of soap in their bathroom, but now it's almost more essential to have on-hand at all times than my cell phone.

Keep Reading... Show less

The decision-makers of Yale's law students have invested in therapy dog sessions in order to reduce stress. In 2011, Yale Law Library had a sign-out sheet for their certified library dog. The 30-minute sessions were equipped with unconditional, stress-busting puppy love.

Law Librarian Blair Kauffman stated that the free, three-day pilot pet therapy program at Yale Law Library launched as "a positive addition to current services offered by the library."

Keep Reading... Show less

I have been working at Dunkin' Donuts for over two years, and during this time, I have progressed from regular crew member to crew coach, and finally, to shift leader. Among my great skills involving the job is my ability to deal with stressful situations, including awful customers. My boss has continuously pointed out the fact that I am able to handle these people with grace and kindness. She herself often finds that she gets snippy with rude customers, but somehow I am able to keep a straight face through these tough times.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments