10 Things Long Distance Couples Are Tired Of Hearing
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10 Things Long Distance Couples Are Tired Of Hearing

No, it's not easy. Yes, it is worth it.

10 Things Long Distance Couples Are Tired Of Hearing
Whitney Mantooth

With my classes beginning within a week and my boyfriend's classes starting this week, I'm starting to realize that we're going to be long distance again in a few short days. Of course, this isn't our first time--we've been doing long distance during the school year since he left for college. Now, with my junior year approaching, I'm suddenly realizing some of my least favorite things to hear when talking about my relationship being long distance. Long distance certainly has gotten easier, thanks to texting, Skype, and so much other technology, but that doesn't mean it's all that desirable. For all you LDR couples, here's some of the things I'm most tired of hearing.

1. "Why didn't you break up after high school?"

Simple: Because I didn't want to break up with him. We were in a good place, I had no inclination to stop dating him. We made each other happier just by talking on a regular basis. It seems to be a common theme in our society, that you need to break up with your significant other before entering college because you have to be free and learn how to live on your own. I have every inclination to figure myself out, but there's no reason I can't figure it out with him at my side. If you want more reason, check out this article by one of my fellow Odyssey writers.

2. "Long distance relationships never work out."

First off, you shouldn't use absolutes. It generally makes you wrong. But beyond that, long distance relationships not only can work but often do work out. Mine has worked out so far. Several friends have seen or been a part of LDRs that have worked out. It takes work, for sure, but it is far from impossible.

3. "Why are you always texting/calling/Skyping with them?"

Well, since we aren't spending time together in person, we have to talk to share any information. We work on not being clingy - we allow each other to work, study, and hang out with friends, but communication is crucial for any relationship success. If we aren't talking to each other via text, phone call, Skype, whatever it is, we aren't communicating to the best of our ability. I enjoy being able to share my daily experiences with him.

4. "You spend too much time driving back and forth to see them."

I would rather drive out to see him then not get to see him. I know that I lose some time going between cities, but to me it's worth the distance, time and work to get there. I'll work on homework when I get there if I have to, just being there is soothing.

5. "Aren't you miserable not being with them all the time?" and "How do you survive being so far apart?"

I'm not miserable. I'm clearly surviving quite well. I'm not thrilled being away from him all the time--it can even be lonely at times. But miserable is certainly not how I would describe it. As for how I survive, I just take it a day at a time. Many people don't realize that the best way to handle long distance is just a day at a time. Slowly, as you get through the days, you suddenly get to see them again.

6. "I totally know how you feel. One time, I spent (short amount of time) away from my significant other."

It's hard to feel sympathy when you've not been apart for long. When your entire relationship has been close to your significant other and you barely spend time apart, you don't truly understand. Sometimes, you honestly might, but it's still hard to hear that someone truly understands your feelings after a few weeks apart.

7. "How do you know they're not cheating on you?"

Pretty simple: I trust him. That's a huge part of long distance. You just have to trust that they aren't cheating, they aren't doing something they shouldn't, they aren't tempting themselves. I know that he expects the same of me, so I don't flirt, I don't go somewhere that might tempt me and I talk with him if I have an issue.

8. "I couldn't do it."

Glad to hear that. It doesn't mean I'm not going to do it. It also doesn't mean I'm better than you for doing it, or you're better than me for not doing it. Long distance isn't for everyone, but it's something I'm committed to.

9. "Long distance isn't as serious."

I think long distance is actually more serious at times. It completely depends on your standards and what you've discussed with your significant other, but long distance tends to be more of a time commitment, more of a struggle. If you're not willing to work for it, you could probably find something less serious in your area.

10. "Why didn't you go to school with your significant other?"

Believe it or not, I chose to do something for myself. If he hadn't have supported that decision, we would have needed to have a conversation anyway, but he was very clear when I chose my college that he wanted what was best for me and we would make it work. I ended up choosing a school that wasn't terribly far away but it was still far enough. UNCG was definitely the best option for me and there's no other place he should have gone than NC State. We make it work, that's all you need to worry about.

Bonus: "When are you guys going to get married?"

Oh man, this comes up all the time. It feels like when you're surviving and thriving in long distance you get asked this question a lot. I don't know, sometime after college--my studies are important to me, his are important to him. We'll get married when we can support ourselves and then someone else.

But with all the questions that just makes you sad, sigh, or complain...I've also heard one of the best questions:

"Do you have any advice for long distance?"

I love getting this question, because not only does it mean I'm doing something right but it means someone else feels like I'm doing something right. It's a pretty awesome feeling. Plus it feels good to help someone else who's going through the same things you've been going through.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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