I knew from the moment I met you that we would grow up to be besties. The key phrase there is "grow up."
As soon as you were old enough to have your first tooth (ouch), an all-out brawl started between us. Things are starting to mellow out, though. We're getting to know each other as more than just "that annoying dude living in the next room," and what I see in you is extraordinary.
Your sweet 16 is coming up, and that means you're right on my tail as far as huge adult-ish milestones. I don't have a lot of money, but I have made a ton of mistakes. I thought giving you some advice for your birthday might help you out as you're getting closer to (*sinister music*) adulthood. Let's take a trip down memory lane and touch on some dumb things I've done so you can avoid them.
When you're upset, don't self-medicate with things you'll regret later.
If there's one lesson I still haven't learned, it's this one. It bites me in the ass every time. It's no secret that my mental health was on the decline for a while. I know what it's like to be on a low-low. While I was stuck in that state for such a long time, I found myself trying anything that would make me feel less empty. That only made things worse because, on top of my original problems, I now had even more regrets to stress about.
If you're feeling down, or even just bored, don't turn to something you know will hurt you in the long run. You can always talk to me. If venting doesn't work, a two-hour-long bath makes even the worst things right again.
It's okay to say no, even to the things you're "supposed" to do.
This is a concept that slapped me in the metaphorical face just these past few weeks. There are a million things that are expected of you - making good grades, having a social life, staying involved inside and outside of school, finding time to sleep, you get the idea. It's super stressful trying to balance it all! I used to go crazy trying to give everything my all, but I realized that I couldn't keep going on that way without at least 11 more of me.
You (and I'm preaching to myself as much as I am to you) have to know your emotional limits and make time for you too. If someone asks you to hang out, but you have something better to do (even if that happens to be eating a whole bag of chocolate chips by yourself), then tell them no! On the other hand, it's also okay to skip out on school and extracurriculars for once and do something for yourself. Burnout is real, and nothing is worth ending up with it.
Don't waste your time on people who wouldn't care either way.
I've broken this rule way more times than I want to remember. You, your time, and your energy are precious things. I think it's important to show everyone love and acceptance, but the deeper you emotionally invest yourself and the less they reciprocate your affection, the more exhausting the relationship can become.
Be quick to love, but also know your limits. Don't let people take advantage of your big heart, and don't let that same big heart cloud your judgment about people!
It's okay to have no clue what you're doing.
I know you're still making up your mind about a lot right now, and that's fine. I can't stress that enough. You have your whole life to change your mind and start from scratch if you want to. People expect you to live 10 years in the future and can be so narrow-minded about how things are "supposed to be."
Don't let anyone steal your youth or decide when it's over for you. Grow up enough in the next few years that you can take care of yourself, but not too much that you forget how to have fun.
Always know that I love you.
I might get on your last nerve, but I want you to know I've always got your back! If you need some company or get in a venting mood, all you have to do is call. I might be three hours away, but when you think about it, that's only the new Jonas Brothers album four times through lol!
Happy sweet sixteen! You're my whole world, gorgeous girl!
